Saturday, November 5, 2011

Day 6 - In Space Noone Can Hear You Yawn

So these 5 Europeans and 1 Chinese dude spent over EIGHTEEN MONTHS in a fake space station, simulating a trip to Mars and back.

1.5 years of airplane food.
Windowless rooms.
Man to Man bonding.

Talks with family members and mission control included 20 minute delays to mimic the distance.

But don't worry, they had books and DVDs.
Time to wax philosophical.

Why no women? Many volunteered, none chosen. Because shit went down the last time that a woman was on a 110 day simulated mission, when a Russian forcibly tried to stick his tongue down her throat a couple times, and Mission Control didn't think it was a big deal. This prompted the departure of a disgusted Japanese crew member.

Russia's RIA Novosti news agency: "After all, women are fragile and delicate creatures; that is why men should lead the way to distant planets and carry women there in their strong hands."

No comment.

Anyhow, wouldn't it feel great to play a pivotal role in enabling humanity to survive on Mars after we fuck over Mother Earth? Yes! But is it worth 520 days that could otherwise be spent procreating? Maybe...

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