Status Red

Me So Pretty

2012-02-14T19:46:00.000-08:00

Well, if i be not mistaken, every Converse store in China has images from the photoshoot i did before.

Poked my head into a couple stores, but have yet to have spotted my face anywhere. i wasn't even sure if the bod in the pics was me, except that i spotted my less than cool qiuku (long johns) clearly visible. Gotta represent.

Plus some pic of me and some guys climbing over a fence. i can recognize the hat i was wearing.

But that's cool. In fact, i haven't even seen the face of the hottest girl who was there. Go figure. Those fuckers are only about the clothes, no doubt.

The "Environment Expert"

2012-02-14T19:03:00.001-08:00

Apparently, not separated at birth

After being promised that i'd get off of copy editing duty and bk into reporting, i'm stuck for another month copy editing.True, there's times when i get an hour or 2 (or 3) to fuck the dog, but this week (being one copy editor short) has been pretty bloody busy.

i correct grammar all day, and (unlike the other copy editors) offer concise bits of advice like "You need to do more research" to ensure journalistic integrity. It's alright, but I'm worry that too much copy editing will lead to what i call Repetitive Brain Injury.

So, i offered to help out w/ this one radio show, and I now have the title "environmental expert" for a weekly 10 minute segment. It's ok, but a bit intense being on live radio and trying to suss out how to time everything. i need to calm down.

Last week we discussed the cadmium spill in the Longjiang River, China's refusal to pay the EU's airflight carbon tax, and global warming and the f'ing cold BJ winter. It was alright. I know the one host wanted to censor out my personal 2cents about the EU tax, but i squeezed it in there:.

"Well after Kyoto, Copenhagen and Durban climate talks, i think the EU knows that multilateral discussions just aren't productive. There's a need for leadership in this. It's like they think they're telling everyone to eat their vegetables whether they like it or not. But the EU isn't a parent, so maybe they have no right to tell people what to do." i added in that last sentence specifically to please my employer. Ha.

This week, i'll talk about how electric cars in China create more pollution than regular cars, how whales legally can't be "enslaved" like people.

Anyhow, that's the exciting news for CRI. Oh, plus a guy asked me to host a music show. And i might be a regular on a game show.

Toeing the Line

2012-02-01T05:43:00.001-08:00

I was copy editing a piece about "Post-Holiday Syndrome", which frankly seemed a bit comical, intentional or not. So i was like, what the hell, and i started inserting adjectives here and there to describe the "hilarity and fun of family dinners" and the "tedium of office work" etc.

Then i duly noted that the author had omitted a conclusion. So i wrote, "you didn't write a conclusion, so i added one for you. What do you think?"

If you are suffering from Post-Holiday Syndrome, fret not, for you are not alone. Hundreds, thousands, millions of others feel the same way as you. You may feel like your work is interminably tiring and uninteresting in comparison with the days of vivid experience and emotionally charged interactions with loved ones. But you did that work before, and… you can do it again! Step by tiny step, Psychologists Fan Xiaodong and He Ru's words of wisdom will help you cope with the difficult realities of life.

And entered it into the system, with a chuckle.

Then i shortly thereafter found another article about PHS on CRI, a proper serious one, actually intending to, like, help people who are feeling, y'know, depressed.

And then i felt all guilty.

Spring Festival 2012

2012-01-31T04:01:00.000-08:00

Having left the teaching profession, i now get one week off for spring fest, as opposed to 4. That's fine, but it forces you into the train and plane ticket rush as millions of people try to get home in time for Chinese new year's day, the Chinese equivalent of Xmas. So... i opted not to visit Q's parents and stay in BJ for the big day. Yes, that may very well have repercussions, but i think it was the right call.

At first, i was rather unsure how i'd kill 8 days of holiday, but it somehow disappeared in a flash, and not once did i work on my painting or guitar song. It was pretty packed with dinners, bars, hiking, fireworks and temples. And recovery time.

i also went to visit a good friend from Acadia, the only edu student who i kept contact with. She's in Shanghai now, so i went there on the shiny new 300km/hr+ train. And amazingly, post-NYD tix were a breeze to nab.

i enjoyed my friend's use of colourful language, but was disappointed that she was uninterested in going to see SH's coolest bar, built into an old bomb shelter. So i went solo. Knocked on the unlabelled door. No answer, so i left.

Then i found a bar that had a pretty bike in the window. And 5 pretty girls sitting inside smiling and beckoning me to enter. So i did. They were well-inebriated, and offered me a baijiu shot within 20 seconds of conversation, but i sneakily managed to escape into the interior, where i struck up a conversation with the bartender about bikes, since the bar was called Bikes and Friends and had bicycle paraphernalia scattered throughout. Oh, and i just bought a fixie bike myself last week.

He was from Toronto. Nice guy. Introduced me to some guy from New York. Who invited me bk to their table. Introduced me to a couple Taiwanese women and a NYC ABC dude. i tentatively ordered a glass of white, since at the Buddhist temple that afternoon, i thought i might take a break from alcohol that night.

But then as the night carried on, rounds of tequila shots were ordered until the bar ran out, resulting in Shoju shots and other bad mixers etc, a couple boys pulled down their pants to wave their bums around, i failed to elicit interesting commentary about Taiwan's election from the pretty woman, one guy confessed to me how "bad" he was because he had a wife and a mistress, and a good time was had by all. Suddenly it was after 5am.

To sum up:
I tripped and smashed my head into a stool, and got a cut over my lip.
The taxi pulled over to let me puke over the side of the express-way.
And i slept through my alarm and missed the train home.

Well, i know Q doesn't exactly approve of this sort of behaviour, but i think it's good to get it out of my system when she's not around, ha.

Dream Interpretation

2012-01-09T05:11:00.001-08:00

i had my first ever flying dream recently. Or, close enough.

i was at CRI w/ a friend and a colleague, walking down a hall that suddenly ended in blackness. But i took a step out into the void and instead of falling to my death/infinity, i found that with difficulty, i could swim in the air. i slowly sank down, and some motion-activated lights revealed a dirt floor a ways below. So i landed and started walking around. My friend and colleague joined me.

We were in a huge room that had a bad odour. It was like a massive aquarium with no windows, but housing some "sea" creatures, like flounders hiding/covered with the dirt. They were sick. We were there to inspect the problem with the animals. But i was on such a rush from the swimming/flying, my mood was high as a kite. My friend was also happy, walking backwards, skimming along the surface of the dirt.

the end.

i discussed the dream w/ my brother, who's well versed with Carl Jung.

1. Going down = deeper into the subconcious. i stepped off the ledge w/out much hesitation, inadvertently revealing my ability to swim in the air.
2. i'm sure the massive, windowless fluorescent lit room with bad ventilation represented China Radio International. CRI stinks. It has problems. And not just the bathroom smell, which sometimes horribly infiltrates the office.
3. And it houses creatures who are sick, who've allowed themselves to get smothered in the surrounding dirt. This metaphor could hardly be improved.
4. But.
5. i'm there with a friend, and one colleague, who i barely ever see or know. He's an older Scottish fellow who is definitely the most positive person i've met at CRI. It's actually already obvious that it's possible to surround myself with good people at CRI.
6. And i can FLY / swim, which feels totally wicked. And i did wonder at one point why i was walking when i could've been flying-swimming. But i had a job to do, and i was doing it. i guess i already had the ability, but the strange circumstance at CRI allowed me to discover it...?

Anyhow, pretty interesting to unravel a pretty direct and surprisingly positive correlation between my dream and my work. One warning inherent in it: don't let yourself become one of those sick flounder thingies. That would truly suck.

What's On My Playlist These Days

2012-01-03T07:27:00.001-08:00

Um, i could do one of those Best of 2011 music lists, but the fact is... i'm a lot less of an indie afficianado than i used to be. But anyhow, if yr interested, here's my Best Music of the Last Two Weeks list, which is probably just as good.

Apparently Xiami.com doesn't fly in N.America, but Grooveshark seems to do the trick...

Russian Red
http://grooveshark.com/#!/album/Fuerteventura/6069642
They call her the Spanish Feist, but i think it sounds like what you'd get if you crossed Mazzy Star's Hope Sandoval and Joanna Newsome and put them on anti-depressants.

Washed Out
http://grooveshark.com/#!/album/Within+And+Without/6141745
I love it: this guy studied Library and Info studies in uni, couldn't find work, recorded an album in his bedroom, put it on Myspace, and then influential music bloggers realized it was the fucking BOMB. Def my most listened to album this year.

Girl Talk - All Day
http://grooveshark.com/#!/album/All+Day/5235582
Slightly less schizo than mixes they've done in the past, and w/ enough 80's hits to please norms and cool kids alike, this is a party winner. How can you say no to a mix which mashes together 372 tracks, laying old and nu school hiphop onto the likes of INXS, Phoenix, Belinda Carlisle, Radiohead, U2, Lady Gaga etc, etc, etc, etc, etc...

Real Estate
http://grooveshark.com/#!/album/Days/7010428
Hey, i'm getting closer to 40 each day, so i can listen to as much mellow jangly guitar alt pop as i want. Apparenlty Wilco is considered "dad rock' now. Fucking hell.

There's a Canadian guy here at CRI, and he does a music show. i finally got around to listening to it, and was happily impressed. Shit, you listen to the radio, and you like here all this like new cool music. How amazingly convenient! And technological.

The Pulse by Johnny Hutong...

Grooveshark. Who woulda thunk it.

statusq's New Year Rez

2012-01-01T20:06:00.000-08:00

i usually don't do these, but i do have ONE for 2012.

Use Facebook less than i did in 2011. Generally, it's a sign that i'm killing time.

President Hu Jintao's New Year Resolutions

2012-01-01T19:52:00.001-08:00

(Lunar New Year Rezzies undisclosed at this point in time)

1. Throw away my ratty worn out Olympic mascot dolls.
2. Stop paying so much attention to the Republican candidacy race.
3. Buy more CK One to mask the pollution smell.
4. Laugh more often at America's expense.
5. See if somebody can speed up my Taiwan tourist visa processing.
6. Get a new navy blue suit. A traditional one, this time.
7. Sneak in to the gallery to see the Ai Weiwei exhibit.
8. Crack down on corruption, like we cracked down on Tibet.
9. Avert the revolution
10. Stop wasting all my time looking for erotic websites to censor.

pic from wikipedia

So Long Last Year, Hello This One

2011-12-31T23:25:00.001-08:00

2010 ended with an argument with my girlfriend, in the midst of a stressy getaway to the seaside city of Qingdao. The plan to even go out for midnight got scrapped.

From there, the months started rolling by. Here's what i think of when i think of 2011 highlights.

Super stressy negotiations and secret meetings about bullshit decisions made by ill-qualified educators.
Travelling solo to Chengdu and Chongqing, eating MSG laden street food intensity.
Sort of quitting, sort of getting fired, and thank God for that.
Tuesday meditation nights, barely attended, but generally ongoing.
Trigger happy photoshooting w/ my GF in Vienna.
Lucky enough to score a new job.
Generally lucky all around.

And for NYE, a bunch of friends spent midnight underneath the world's 2nd biggest television screen along w/ a couple thousand people. Then we slipped into an underground dance club where i was happily drunk and the GF was happily sober, and the music was a lot better than we'd expected.

As for 2012... i have a feeling that it's going to be pretty different from 2011.

Not sure about Mayan calendar mayhem, but... i suspect that energetically, things could be more intense than usual. So i reckon that taking that into account, it could be particularly beneficial to be self-aware, doing your best to promote your own good karma, as well as that in others.

And of course, i won't be surprised if global economic/environmental meltdown starts happening. i know, i know, patience is its own virtue...

Cheers, everyone. Hope that your 2012 is as balanced, forgiving, epiphanic, wild, and peaceful as you need it to be.

Photo: not mine.

Modern Technology

2011-12-25T13:37:00.000-08:00

A old friend who sometimes spends too much time on the computer recently informed me that he checks my blog too frequently to chk for updates.

And i thought: wow, cool, but what waste of time considering that i sometimes have a month or so without a post.

Well now, in today's days of high tech wizardry, you can RSS feed it (which i don't know how to do exactly) or you can get an automatic email reply from each of my (possibly) elucidating, enlightening, and downright entertaining ramblings.

If you ACT NOW you'll get a FIFTY PERCENT DISCOUNT, and we'll even send you a FREE bottle of SKIN TONER!!!

Just drop me a line if yr interested.

Boneheads

2011-12-25T12:59:00.000-08:00

Wow, i just realized that the architecture articles and the sound piece i did actually got linked to quite a bit.

But, when some boneheads go and post to the audio file, but include a picture of Steven Holl's Moma (above), as opposed to any of the building's that were actually written about in the article, well that's just a disgrace.

Not to say that the Moma building isn't great. It is. Good cafe and arthouse theatre there too.

But those boneheads are still boneheads.

But mostly it was fun to see that a bunch of architecture and design sites were interested in my articles.

More interest in that than in my rather tardily submitted radio piece about nonconsumerist xmas. Which we did, btw. Not buy presents, i mean.

Oh yeah, merry Christmas, everyone, btw. If you celebrate it. i'm Buddhist, so don't tell anyone that i said that, 'kay? but in China, everyone can get away w/ saying merry Christmas. Most people have never even considered that Christmas is, like, religious, or anything. And Kwanzaa's not the thing here quite yet.

pic from http://www.clauss-markisen.de/161.0.html

Hitting the Air Waves

2011-12-22T05:42:00.000-08:00

Well, i definitely feel that this could be a better product, but it's not bad for a 1st go, after teaching myself Adobe Audition, and how to use the recording studio, blah blah.

i submitted it to a radio head, and she aired it on China Now. Then the weird thing, is the next day, my brother says he listened to it on Global Times, which is not even the state media i work for.

Anyhow, for those interested in my 1st ever self-produced radio piece, i present to you:

The Changing Face of Beijing Architecture

Here's some pix of the buildings too.

Galaxy Soho

Local car attendant: "It's beautiful. Of course I like [Galaxy Soho], but I can not live in it." [Photo: CRIENGLISH.com/William Wang]

Wangjing Soho

Phoenix International Media Center

Life, as per normal.

2011-12-16T08:01:00.001-08:00

Bumped into an unexpeceted somebody at an unexpected place and got some totally unexpected news.

All i can say is that life is a pretty weird thing. Or to be more accurate, nothing is weird, but thinking makes it so. (or feeling).

Enough about that already.

Believe it or not, i'm not actually trying to be cryptic at all, ha.

Also.

Spoke w/ a couple dear but far removed friends recently, and while not exactly happy to hear about their problems, i felt like i could relate, y'know? And felt happy that they could relate to me.

i dig life, but it's true, i am pretty far removed from many loved ones, and certainly could do a better job staying in touch. Drop me a line, and i'd be happy to set up a skype date, yo.

News alert?

2011-12-16T07:53:00.001-08:00

Um, wow, nobody told me that Jack Layton died while i was vacationing in Europe.

That stinks.

i thought that he was a pretty decent guy. He was a lefty, but looked like a righty. A fierce sheep in wolf's clothes.

i'm pretty darn out of touch w/ Canadian politics. Can anyone give me an update on how things have shifted since that Conservative majority?

Aside from that f'ing sickening disappointment that came out of the Durban talks, that is...

Wet Dreams

2011-12-14T18:58:00.000-08:00

The other night i was asleep in bed, cozily snuggled under the heavy blankets. It's bloody cold in a house that lacks working central heating, don't you know. And i was having this dream that somebody had spilled tea in the bed, and the tea was turning colder by the minute. Well dang, that ain't cozy or comfortable.

In a state of semi-consciousness, the bed was indeed wet. Oh fuck, some idiot spilled tea in the bed. Hm? That's weird who could've done that? Maybe... i reached down and stuck my hand in my underwear to reassess the situation, and sadly confirmed my suspicions.

(Oh fuck, did i really just do that? What the hell, i haven't done that in ~~months~~ decades!!!)

So i crawl out into the cold air, take a(nother) piss, throw my wet jammies in the hamper, and figure... well hell, everything's already soaked through. No point in disturbing Q in the middle of the night.

So i crawled bk into the wet spot and fell back into dreamland.

Anyhow, i have no explanation for the above incident. i had had one single drink of fake scotch at a bar, hours previous to hitting the sack, but took a leak as per normal before bed.

Just one of those situations where you feel blameless, 'cause it's not like you (consciously) DID anything, y'know?

Jerry Seinfeld told his daughter once, "It's good if you're embarrassed. That means you're making other people feel good." Well screw Seinfeld! Who says i'm embarrassed? i posted it on my own f'ing blog for crying out loud!

It's Not Pathetic: It's Ascetic

2011-12-06T04:20:00.001-08:00

Hung out the other night with a guy who's adopted an ascetic life style.

He's pretty hardcore.

He's from Santa Barbara, CA, and came out to Asia on a spiritual quest of sorts. For the last 11 months he has neither worn shoes (or socks) or touched money.

In fact, he hadn't planned on doing this for so long. He's on a journey to India, but a lost passport kinda threw a wrench in the works. Well, the embassy got him a new passport somehow, but... he has no visa. He can't leave China without one, and he can't get one without buying one. With money. He's kinda up the creek on that one, thinking about how to sneak over Tibetan borders.

First question. How does he eat?

He would walk through restaurants and grab food that customers hadn't finished. "French fries are good for picking up." Sometimes, he'd go for 3 days without food. Sometimes people would give or buy him food. Veg only. And sometimes he's teach english at a monastery and dine with the monks. He was definitely thin, but seemed fine.

Food is the only thing he let's people pay money for. Although when a handful of us went for dinner, we hopped on the bus, and he got all stressed out that we paid for his 15 cent bus ride. "I guess I'll just call that part of the dinner cost," he said forlornly.

He can't speak chinese, but he can more or less write it.

2nd question. Why no shoes? Dunno. But he did say he's intentionally framed himself as an outsider. His feet were pretty dirty, though the rest of him seemed quite clean. His hair was long, his face unshaven, but you know... he was clean.

3rd question. Where does he sleep? Usually on the street. Do note that it's pretty darn cold at night in BJ these days, below zero for sure. Sometimes he's invited to spend a night at someone's house, but he only allows himself to stay at one person's place for one night.

He calls himself a prisoner to the rules that he created for himself, accepting the hardships as His Path. But he admits that he hopes that he can get to India soon, since he feels like hanging around BJ is a total waste of his time. Well, i don't know if my own spirituality would keep me uppity either in his shoes.

So. Yes, his lifestyle is extreme. Yes, he has a life filled with hardships. For example, when i commented on his red eyes, he said that he's been wearing contact lenses in his eyes for 8 months straight, since he has no saline solution or lens case; he's well aware that his "rules" are f'ing with his health. But, talking with this young guy, he struck me as an intelligent, articulate, and sensitive guy. I'm sure I'll see him again sometime. He might join in for meditation night sometime, but i don't know how Q would handle him at this point. Hey, i'm well-acquainted w/ leftcoast hippies, so i can get on this guys level okay!

Alex Kristof 1994-2011

2011-12-03T07:50:00.000-08:00

In what has been the worst possible outcome of events, Alex Kristof has passed away, at the young age of 16.

He was a really cool kid, intelligent, and respectful. i'm thankful that i got to spend more time than usual with him this summer, cycling and camping.

My thoughts are with his parents (mom and stepdad) whom have been two of my closest friends for many years. My thoughts are with his younger sister. With his friends, peers, and community. i hope everyone can make their peace.

Weird how all stumble through this life, making the best decisions we can, sometimes getting lucky, sometimes unlucky, getting some things right, some things wrong. I hope we can accept that terrible, unjustifiable tragedies happen, and that there still is a power greater than us trying to steer each one of us where we ought to go.

Day 30 - i Love My Job (for today, at least)

2011-11-30T03:04:00.000-08:00

Have you ever thought, "i love my job"? i might've once before when i worked at a sorta hip cafe when i was 20something, but not since then. (and obviously, noone loves cafe work for the LT.)

'Til today.

Didn't go into the office today, 'cause i had managed to set up three interviews w/ architects.

First, i was rather surprised i even managed to score an interview w/ Zaha Hadid Architects, since they're one of the hottest firms on the planet right now, but i interviewed the director of TWO massive Beijing projects right now, Galaxy Soho and Wangjing Soho. i laid aside my list of questions, but we basically covered everything through our wandering and totally fascinating conversation. Smart dude. i might take him up on his offer to tour the Galaxy Soho site.

Then i went to shoot photos of another site. Flash a business card, and ask people to let you into their top floor offices to take photos, and most people will shrug and show you the way. Score.

And also talking to Beijingers on the street about the projects, and getting them to explain themselves. There's three responses. "It's great, why wouldn't everyone love it?" "I don't understand it. I don't know if it looks good or bad. I don't get it." and one super cool lady who was selling barbecue skewers who initially said she had nothing to say before eventually talking my ear off about how it's totally wrong to put this sort of massive new structure into the hallowed grounds within the Second Ring Road, and it pays no respect to tradition, and old Beijingers got cheated out of their homes, and it'll be all foreigners working in the new building, and all the Beijingers will have to move outside of the 6th Ring Rd, etc, etc. i was really disappointed that she wouldn't give me her name or let me take a picture. Hell, she didn't even want me to write about her ideas... but i don't know if i can keep that many nuggets of gold to myself...

Day 28 - Questions

2011-11-28T01:39:00.001-08:00

I'm frantically trying to throw together 3 articles about modern architecture in BJ this week, trying to get interviews w/ the architecture companies. In the event that i actually get to interview some people, i wrote some questions. And dang, i think some of them are pretty darn good.

Note: BJ's got some pretty wild building slated to be built. They look so cool, i can almost forget about their cost and elitist orientation...

1. The design of _________ is massive in scale, creating a strong impact on the viewer. Is bigger always better?

2. The design is distinctly modern, but also alien. Alien, referring to something beyond the Earth clearly goes beyond boundaries of countries. Can this design be dropped into any country or any location? How does this building fit into Beijing differently than it would in another country or city?

3. Many people complain that Beijing is just a testing ground for international architects, implying that these buildings wouldn't be built in other international cities. What would be your defense to this?

4. There was a real interest in sci-fi influenced design in the 1970's. The design of __________ seems to fit into a revival of futuristic or outer space design. What do you think about the past and future of this trend?

5. Why is architecture happening today called "futuristic"? Why isn't all architecture "futuristic"?

Busy today, work taking longer than it should. And then dwelling on some troubles that some close friends are going through in the side moments. Metta, metta...

Day 27 - Sad News

2011-11-27T05:44:00.001-08:00

On top of yesterday's bad news comes more today.

When bad things happen to close friends, it can affect you strangely directly. Sorry, i don't have much more to say than that.

Day 26 - Rest in Peace, Sofia Rumeau

2011-11-25T19:20:00.000-08:00

i got a message on Facebook today from my friend Sofia's daughter that my friend Sofia in Paris has just passed away.

i worked with Sofia in 2004 at the France Vipassana centre, and she generously invited me to stay with her husband and 2 (of 5) kids in the Paris suburbs. i lived with them for a full month during which time she and her husband repeatedly and emphatically insisted that i was not in any way imaginable overstaying my welcome.

Sofia was a truly unique person, born in Portugal of African descent. Reared 5 children from 4 (maybe 5) different fathers. All but 1 of whom loved her to bits as far as i could ascertain.

She was also tuned in to higher planes. Vipassana courses are a very logical and scientific form of inward exploration, but in these courses Sofia alone had the most interesting visions of and dialogues with enlightened beings (Buddha, Jesus). In one course i myself had a vision of Chinese faces which passed through my mind's eye in procession. Some old, some young, each one perfectly detailed. i wondered, "Wow, is my subconscious creating all these uniquely realistic faces?" Sofia later matter of factly commented, "No, those were angels." i never questioned how she knew.

She was somehow touched. Born in silence, not crying, she entered the world in refusal to demonstrate the suffering which Buddha uses to describe humanity's condition. In fact she was mute for 2 years or more, until her father finally used his belt to discover if she could cry out loud or not.

She suffered much violence from her father, yet also described fondly his hospitality at feeding any people and any number, friends or beggars, who happened to be near the house at a meal time.

Sofia had a touch of clairvoyance, and sometimes her desires were granted. She had wanted to independently give birth to a child, and did so once. Attempting to walk the miles to the hospital, she stopped at the side of the road and delivered her own child using her only her own hands.

There was in fact much suffering throughout her life. At the time when i met her, her marriage to Jack was starting to fall apart. i ended up acting as a buffer zone between them, even offering to act as a moderator to help them communicate. i wasn't surprised to hear later that Jack had left her, but it was a real blow to Sofia. She became reclusive.

Things for her became worse when one of her sons wound up dying destitute. i had met him a couple times and he was doing okay, but it was clear that he of all the siblings was unhappy. Sofia was devastated by his final downward spiral, but could only say that he had chosen his own path. Her love for her children was unrestrained.

She and i had discussed recording her memoirs, and it's a tragedy that this was never done. Her unembellished stories were amazing and touching.

i regret that i never really paid back her generosity. i regret that i let my fading skills in French prevent me from keeping contact with her. i regret that i started a letter to her just last week that was never sent.

Sofia, je t'embrasse trop fort. Je souhaite que tu as trouver ton paix.

Day 25 - Breathe Easy(ish)

2011-11-25T03:59:00.000-08:00

Oh. So that's what it feels like when you don't take your work home with you. Nice.

Funny. The CRI website has 4 "recommended" articles on it. They're all by me.

And due to someone's slip up my official job as copy editor is delayed by another week, and so i'm on reporter duty for another stretch. Everyone says how boring it is to do copy editing, though my employer tried to convey how important it is to step up the quality of the CRI website content. And yes, it can be pretty shit.

Today two people (and one was my supervisor) said i should push to get on the air doing talk radio, to make life at CRI bearable. Really. i don't want to be a downer or anything, 'cause really i'm stoked to be doing this stuff. But everyone at CRI talks about how working there sucks the enthusiasm out of you. "You need to stop caring" they commonly say. Oh come on people. Can't you let me dream for just a little bit?

Day 24 - Damn Americans

2011-11-24T05:33:00.000-08:00

What? It's thanksgiving AGAIN? Oh fine already.

i'm thankful to have a new job.
i'm thankful to have bust out of education.
i'm thankful to have been in education.
i'm thankful for my VPN.
i'm thankful for the bit of patience i have.
i'm thankful to be at least slightly cognizant of a Buddhist perspective.
i'm thankful that some strange beings still read my ramblings.
i'm thankful that i have enough self awareness to know i'm slightly grumpy and underslept right now.

Day 23 - Spa La La

2011-11-23T05:16:00.000-08:00

Dang, missed a day. Busy chilling in the hot springs.
Did 2 in 1 day. That makes for a lot of running, rescheduled interviews, and blazing through as many hot pools as possible in 25 minutes.

Also...
Broke some rules with a cool taxi driver.
Interviewed someone who was apparently sort of famous.
Drank beer brewed at the hot spring.
Turned down the VIP tour. 'Cause that would be waste of time.
And i had none.
Talked my way into the hot springs after me and my boss received repeated prior refusals.
Skipped lunch for the first time in like a decade.
Worked several hours of overtime.

And enjoyed the last hot spring that much more.

Day 22 - Sick Girlfriend

2011-11-22T05:54:00.001-08:00

Q's sick. She went in to the TCM doctor today, where they stuck massive needles into her neck. Then came the flame-heated cups to suck about a cup's worth of tainted blood out. Hurt like a bitch, apparently. Now she's all freaked out that she's supposed to do it again tomorrow.

And the next day.

Day 21 - Biked Out

2011-11-21T05:06:00.000-08:00

Rode to work today.

75 min to get there.

Longer to get back.

It was cold out.

But i felt pretty good.

Day 20 - Finishing Touches Finished

2011-11-19T23:43:00.000-08:00

Untitled (temporarily)
By statusq
Acrylic paint and duct tape on canvas

Well, last weekend i did work on my painting, but finished it just the other day. Still working on the title though. Like many things, it took a long time and a lot more work and frustration than is apparent in the final product. But now i feel pretty satisfied.

Here's what one critic said about it:

Red duct tape which simultaneously references the Communist flag and tools of common labour is delineated from a virtually black night sky. Partly figurative, hinting at abstraction, the towering buildings give a spatial two point perspective dynamism to the composition. Communist stars are distorted into organic splatters, creating a dichotomy with the rigidly structured city which they seek to dominate.

Wow, that guy know what he's talking about, apparently.

I also have a partner painting to go with this one, but i'm a bit uninspired/lost for the moment. Maybe next weekend.(Don't ask about the song. That one's moving backwards).

Day 19 - Cold Weather

2011-11-19T08:58:00.000-08:00

Saw this movie a while ago and really dug it. My bro saw brief intermittent moments of it and thought it seemed dull. Q left about an hour into it.

This is the movie that convinced me to read Sherlock Holmes (also, Haruki Murakami mentions Holmes stories now and again in his novels). And there's no doubt that there's this all-pervading sense of normalcy that manages to stick to even the most Hollywood aspects of the stripper, heist and chase scenes. I absolutely love the way the adrenaline has been pried out of every moment.

The dialogue is achingly mundane. But not boring. Just like regular ol' good conversation. And this sense of the everyday is what makes watching inevitable turns of events so interesting to watch when they play out.

Also, i feel like i know these people. Working graveyard shift of a Prince Rupert salmon canning factory puts me right at eye level with the sort of environment these characters live in. Also the protagonist is weirdly similar to the guy who used to drum in my band.

Well, that's just my opinion. Frankly i was kinda weirded out to see a review whereupon Roger Ebert positively drooled all over it.

So anyhow. As the December approaches and the temperatures drop, you may (or may not) enjoy this lovely piece of indie cinema.

Day 18 - JiuHua Resort - In Hot Water

2011-11-18T05:34:00.000-08:00

Hot Springs visit #2.

The Tibetan Bath and Massage was alright, but really the highlight was sitting in the outdoor rock pool filled with Chinese herb suffused waters, along with a dozen wrinkly old Chinese folks, all of us perfectly distracted from our sagging skin by the China vs Germany women's volleyball game, as shown on the sort of large TV screen.

It's perfect really: as the stress and tension arises, they're simultaneously relaxed and dissipated.

(China won.)

Day 17 - The Real Dirt

2011-11-17T05:35:00.000-08:00

Tonight me and Q walked to pick up her dry cleaning. She was so happy to see her black clothes delivered so clean and shiny. If you didn't know she's a real clean freak about her clothes.

Back outside our apartment, we stopped so she could buy a roasted sweet potato, and i held her clothes for her. Then i thought it'd be a good idea to fetch a plastic bag outta my bag. (A plastic bag saved is a plastic bag earned.)

And i was sure i had all three pieces of clothing secured. Not realizing that there were four. And the rebellious fourth snuck out and hurled itself onto the ground, which was covered in particularly muddy mud.

Q was furious. She gets that way about pristine clothes. i felt bad about it, but not that bad. But there was no question, how it managed to elude both my arm and also its plastic sheathing was a real Houdini move. That fucker. Q angrily threw the forlorn sweet potato to the soggy ground before attempting to wipe the mud off of the other wrapped clothes.

Then we somberly marched back to the cleaners so the lady could laugh at us. Q was mad, humphing and pinching me occasionally. It's true, she knows no middle ground in terms of anger. But... it was kinda sweet somehow. We came back, had a smoke, and then she played some Patrick Duff for me while i put the finishing touches on my painting.

His guitar reminds me of the Jesus and Mary Chain.

pic from http://www.flickr.com/photos/hyperjet/414214512/sizes/m/in/photostream/

Day 16 - The Good Life

2011-11-16T02:26:00.001-08:00

Today. Out on assignment from CRI to report on hot springs. Sent out to a reasonably posh place where most tourists are Japanese and Korean.

An attractive young lady with a bit of English struggles through my interview questions and gives me a thorough tour.

At the end, I'm like, Okay, can i use the hot springs now?

"Oh you want to go IN the springs?"
"Yes, then I can write about how i feel about them."
"But then you need to pay." (Ridiculous! i already phoned twice and they said i could try things out) "Or we can give you a discount."

My supervisor tells me there's no budget for it.

Me and the woman argue a bit, eventually i speak to another manager, she calls another manager, he makes a phone call, and then i'm told, "No problem. We give you complimentary spa and food. No massage." (Well beggars can't be choosers.)

Ahhhhh, so soooothing and relaaaaaxing....

Day 16 - You Gotta Problem Wid Dat?

2011-11-16T01:39:00.000-08:00

So i missed a day. Sue me.

Work: I don't particularly like being assigned to write shit that's essentially advertising for high end hotels. i'm going to try and bend the piece into an article about Slow Food.

That's it.

But here's a couple of my favourite youtube vids to keep you entertained!

Day 14- Officially Working For China State Media

2011-11-14T06:35:00.000-08:00

First day on the new job. Reporting in the travel section for 2 weeks before getting switched over to copy editing. Which everyone says i gotta get out of.

Already got one article up online.

And now researching/writing a piece on Beijing hot springs. As of Wed, i'll be out to interview people and have a hot tub.

And assigned to attend a lecture and interview a photographer/blogger on Saturday.

All things considered, a pretty sweet intro to the new job.

And after work, came downtown w/ a handful of coworkers for 2 for 1 burgers (mine was portobello) and beers.

Welcome to China state media.

Day 13 - It's Not Money; It's Momentum

2011-11-13T05:43:00.000-08:00

What makes the world go around?

For the time being, i think it's just that we, and the systems which we are stuck in, are in so deep that we can't figure out how to make a figurative left hand turn.

My dad recently told me that nobody trades in stocks in denominations of less than 100, and advised me to quit pissing around buying 20 of this or that stock. (Hey, those 20 stocks cost me $500, Dad!)

So i'm presently selling off a bunch of losing stocks. Lots of the stocks, like Carmanah Tech, look like this:

i just threw a bunch of money at some green companies in an effort to get money out of the bank system, whose ethics ought not be admired. i looked at a few charts, and bought some stocks that didn't seem to be dying any faster than the others.

But.

Some really are dying faster than others.

Well that is annoying. For now, i prefer not to count up the total amount lost, or the equivalent number of hours spent attaining said sum.

i'm not big into money, since i grew up comfortably enough, and prefer not to think about it too much. But i know that that's exactly how the Wall Street CEO's like it. So i should be more informed and aware of money dealings. But fuck, is it boring.

Also, my financial self-education is pretty limited, taking cues from Youtube videos, like the one below. Which i suspect is true, though i still haven't taken his advice. My bad.

Day 12 - Improving the Soil Conditions

2011-11-12T01:12:00.001-08:00

It's official. Today we started a compost on the balcony. i pray it doesn't stink up or get fruit fly infestation as i occasionally had in Van.

Mostly i want to improve the shitass dry soil that i got from the store, which basically prevented most seeds from even sprouting, and even the mint requires watering every 3 days.

Paired up with BJ's summer heat, the excessive sunshine didn't help matters.

Here's to better days, and fresh greens and cherry tomatoes for the salad. When shit falls apart, we'll just subsist happily in the apartment for another 24 hours before facing the desperate mobs below...

Day 11 - Single's Day

2011-11-11T00:27:00.001-08:00

'11-11-11!!!
That many single digits of singular value can only mean one thing: today is SINGLE'S DAY. You poor suckers in North America have no day to celebrate a life which hasn't tossed a partner onto your pathway. So. Why don't you guy find some other lonely souls and have dinner together. Ironically, Singles Day is to help people hook up.

News: CRI called me today to ask me to start up on Monday. Sure ok, can do.

Sorry to the Chinese school. i went in today, and they gave me another free 3 hrs of trial lesson, and i promised them to be back on Mon. But now i'll have to stand them up.

i guess now i really need to exploit my last few hours of free time. Speak of the devil. i got me a deadline. Who's an [artist's] best friend?

pic from http://makergo.com/shutup/index.php?s=Dirt+Balls

Day 10 - (Not) Enough Time

2011-11-10T07:05:00.000-08:00

If you had more time, what would you do with it?
-Read more?
-Spend more time with friends and family?
-Meditate?
-Exercise?
-Play music?
-Create art?
-Write a book?

Well, I'm blessed to have quite a bit of time these days, being underemployed and all. I could (and should) a bit more than i do, but tend to get distracted or lack motivation.

In fact, i try to do everything on the list above, though frankly get embarrassingly little done. It's easy to waste time on things of little consequence (although i have really been enjoying the hours of Twin Peaks lately.)

Also, in order to make myself more productive i'm going to re-enter Chinese classes tomorrow, and then hit Greenpeace for a few hours.

Inspiration on the painting and song have dwindled sharply. Deadlines are an [artist's] best friend: and i have none. If anyone out there would help me commit to a timeline, i'd certainly appreciate it. ie) If anyone out there wants to complete a song within 24 or 48 hours, i swear i'll do it too (or at least a working version).

Also, i wrote a 4500 word piece of creative nonfiction, and have been wasting all sorts of time trying to find a publisher. Sorely disappointed that Vice magazine didn't take it, since i don't know who else deals with both literature and trash...

Day 9 - Twin Peaks

2011-11-09T04:41:00.000-08:00

i started watching Twin Peaks, that old TV show, possibly the weirdest stuff to ever hit mainstream television, thanks to the gifted likes of David Lynch.

i love it.

i love Detective Cooper.

And i love apple pie (and coffee).

Day 8 - Being a Model Citizen

2011-11-08T06:37:00.000-08:00

Models always say that being a model is hard work. That's bullshit.

(Kind of).

Okay, I was on site for 9 hours. But most of it was waiting around. Got well- fed, including booze for dinner.

3 boy models, 3 girls, and about 20 other people onsite, about 1/2 flown in from Shanghai.

The hard work part was acting like an energetic teenager, repeatedly swinging from the light system, climbing over shaky scaffolding, clamboring over rusty fences, or jumping off dangerously high speaker stacks. Now my thighs are sore, and i ripped a toenail somehow.

I dug how the first thing that happened for each shoot was someone would take the shiny shoes, take them outside, and return w/ dirt and grease all over them. Later they'd stomp on your feet a few times for good measure.

At one point, me and the girl model were sitting in a graffiti'd up van from the dump, and the producer, director, photographer and videographer were directing us. "Ok Kyla. Now get behind him. Look him in the eyes. Walk up. Good, now straddle him. Wil. Put your hands on her legs. No not her bum, her legs!" They all seemed to think that was pretty hilarious. Looking into my eyes, she said, "It's ok. Just pretend I'm your girlfriend." We both had a smoke after that shoot.

Many outfits later, and bearing freezing temperatures in t-shirts, me and everyone else was happy to call it a day. i got paid a lot more than i'd expected, which is great. Yes, you can make a living for looking pretty, but i sure as hell wouldn't want to do this regularly: having photographers ask you to look more excited, and then being told by producers to stop making faces, and then being told by photographers to look more excited again. And then the producers laughing at the faces you make when the chick is practically giving you a lap dance.

Apparently the footage may end up in videos shown in taxis across the country. If so, i'll post it for ya.

Day 7 - One of Those Skate Shoes Companies Wants Me

2011-11-07T03:03:00.000-08:00

Today, i went up to some hotel room and tried on some clothes for a stylist.

10 or so fashionable people (and 1 semi-pro skater) were bustling about. Healthy chunk of foreigners. All spoke pretty good English.

Tomorrow morn we go to a club to do a fashion shoot for the website.

My friend's gf had called me to ask if I was interested. "Sure, I'm free. Does it pay?"

They wanted musician-types. Although later it was clarified that ugly musicians need not apply. Or those who don't fit into skinny jeans.

Weird. This city of 18 million other slanty-eyed people, and this is the 3rd time i get asked to model. It's my double eyelids for sure. And i did notice that one of the producers had hers glued up...

Day 6 - In Space Noone Can Hear You Yawn

2011-11-05T23:52:00.000-07:00

So these 5 Europeans and 1 Chinese dude spent over EIGHTEEN MONTHS in a fake space station, simulating a trip to Mars and back.

1.5 years of airplane food.
Windowless rooms.
Sobriety.
Man to Man bonding.

Talks with family members and mission control included 20 minute delays to mimic the distance.

But don't worry, they had books and DVDs.
Time to wax philosophical.

Why no women? Many volunteered, none chosen. Because shit went down the last time that a woman was on a 110 day simulated mission, when a Russian forcibly tried to stick his tongue down her throat a couple times, and Mission Control didn't think it was a big deal. This prompted the departure of a disgusted Japanese crew member.

Russia's RIA Novosti news agency: "After all, women are fragile and delicate creatures; that is why men should lead the way to distant planets and carry women there in their strong hands."

No comment.

Anyhow, wouldn't it feel great to play a pivotal role in enabling humanity to survive on Mars after we fuck over Mother Earth? Yes! But is it worth 520 days that could otherwise be spent procreating? Maybe...

Day 5 - Til Death Do We Live

2011-11-04T22:24:00.000-07:00

At present, I'm reading the following books:

Sherlock Holmes - The Complete Novels and Stories. Pretty good, though the stories have started to feel repetitive, with different details. Now i'm just hitting the stories highlighted on the back cover blurb.

The Copy-editor's Handbook - Kind of a nerdy, yet surprisingly interesting look at keeping keeping grammar consistent.

and

The Words of My Perfect Teacher, a book about the teachings of Tibetan Buddhism. This book, had a pretty damn dull beginning, but it's certainly gotten better, and I was into this idea in it about death. Meditating on death every night, 'cause you might not wake up in the morning. Meditate on death each morning, because there's no guarantee you'll make it to nightfall.

Even Mr Steve Jobs (who i'm rather sick of seeing and hearing about all the bloody time) said something about how if he goes through too many days feeling like he wouldn't feel satisfied if they were his last days, then something needs to change.

Unfortunately, these thoughts on death don't yet rouse me to action. For this week, before i die, i wanna: finish that painting, write another song, study more Chinese, talk a bit more w/ my girlfriend.

Day 4 - Greenpeace

2011-11-04T04:52:00.000-07:00

Well, when yr barely working, you have time for things like... surfing the internet! And... reading books! But more likely surfing the internet!

But also, I've been hanging out at the Greenpeace South Asia office a bit. It's alright. Volunteering in China for an enviro organization has been on my list of things to do for a long time, and some woman in a club who worked there totally said it would be useful for me to do so. So i did.

And it's true, they put me to work. i do internet research on Google Analytics. i write media guides to tell new employees about social networking media and how to take good digital photos, and how to write for a digital audience. i choose photos to create thematic and artistic essays.

In some ways, i admit it would feel better if i were actually getting paid for it, but that's just how it rolls sometimes.

Anyhow it's cool to know that there's other enviro heads in China (inc lots of locals), and they all seem pretty caj.

Day 3 - BlogHim

2011-11-03T06:21:00.001-07:00

Gotta say.

Nablopomo (National Blog Posting Month) had its own website, which recently closed.

The new website hosted on blogHer.com.

The organizer loudly states clearly that Yes, men are still more than welcome.

But frankly, i'm not particularly keen.

And i consider myself of an egalitarian feminist than yr average joe.

i feel excluded.

Or out of place.

Is this how women felt about the Walkman?

I don't mean to complain (for fear of being compared to those idiots who started Straight Pride or something).

Just sayin'.

Day 2 - PalindromemordnilaP (MOM and DAD)

2011-11-02T06:43:00.000-07:00

Today is 2011-11-02. Woohoo!oohoow.
Palindromes are oft believed to be good luck.

Today was also the last day of my parents' 2 week visit to China. My bro and i showed them a rather good time. We're both barely employed, which gives them reason to nag here and there, but it also freed us up to really take them around, which i was totally unable to do the last time they were in town. In fact we hung out way more than in Calgary even.

Me and D really played the Good Sons, i thought, by organizing most everything, getting them transit passes, playing tour guides, picking up and dropping off, all that.

Also me and my folks ducked out to visit Pingyao, the incredibly well-preserved Qing dynasty financial capital of China. Which they enjoyed, despite the offences of every noise and inconvenience which make the place charming.

Other stuffs:
-Patiently let my mom shop as much as she wanted.
-w/ Q's help lined up many quality eateries.
-and a few select cheap-o ones.
-went to see a Puccini opera.
-taught Mom how to use a cell phone.
-forced my mom to appreciate modern art (and Ai Weiwei)
-Got drunk a couple times drinking baijiu with my dad.

If you didn't know it, my parents are actually pretty cool. i'm a lucky kid.

But back to the palindromes (note the cyclic structure) here's Weird Al to drive the point home.

Nov 1 - Halloween

2011-10-31T19:59:00.000-07:00

Well, it's National Blog Posting Month! And strangely enough, i'm still blogging. Tune in for daily quirky and cute observations about current events and random musings.

First: the night of Satan worshiping.

On Saturday, D bumped into our neighbours (who we'd never met before) and got invited to their Halloween party, which was very entertaining drunken time. I was a mediocre Hank Williams Sr, D had a black bag on his head. "I know who you are," announced one girl to him, "You're the rapist!"

Monday we hit a club to see a ridiculously packed concert of banging electro rock. Before leaving i figured i oughta throw together a costume, found a box, a tennisball, some wires, and a bike light. Presto: the 30 minute robot. Boy, it sure is easy to impress sometimes. Although i couldn't see that well. i mean, i posed for pictures w/ people including w/ Muammar Gaddafi's arms around me, and i never even saw the guy.

And the show was rad. A Brit duo, done up like Kiss rocked it, as did local act Pet Conspiracy. Okay, even i admit that they could be criticized for more show than substance, but frankly at a drunken party, people dig the show. The more choreographed dramatics, the better.

Here's an older version of the band if yr curious at all...

The Foshan Girl - Hit and Run

2011-10-21T21:30:00.000-07:00

Warning: the video below is pretty disturbing. Not exactly graphic, but you can get the gist of everything happening.

I just watched the above video, having avoided it for some time. I post it here because it's one of those things (like the twin towers) where visually there's an impact that affects you in a rather different way than reading all about it.

In a nutshell, a 2 year old girl was hit twice by a van, and then hit by another. And too many pedestrians turned a blind eye to the girl. This certainly made headlines across the planet, not necessarily because it's important news but because it's certainly the kind of story that resonates with people and with people's impression of China.

Not that that's wrong. Chinese media's also been all over this thing. I think this Guardian article's got it right (by a Chinese writer) who connects the event w/ a population still struggling to get over the survivalist mentality of the cultural revolution. And embarrassingly, the courts here have in the past attacked rather than praised good Samaritans.

Personally, i was surprised at my reaction to watching the vid above. Often, in fact, when i see stuff like that my get craves for retribution. Where's the culprit? Where's their shameful apology? i don't know why i want to see that stuff so bad, but i do. So much for forgiveness. i might forgive after i see the tears of shame and guilt.

Biking to Cuandixia

2011-10-19T06:48:00.000-07:00

Well, i stayed in BJ for the whole of Golden Week, so still had itchy feet. i decided to cycle out to Cuandixia, a tiny spec of a Ming dynasty village. Although i've been there once before, taking a bike the 90 km there would be a whole new adventure.

My bike. Which has its frame and forks misaligned, after (i suspect) a car backed into it. No gear shifters or cables. Broken seat. A bit of a ramshackle machine, which i love nonetheless.

Headed out at ten. i figured i could get there in about 5 hours. i was wrong. i was def into the mountains when some cyclists heading the other way asked me for directions (ha). Upon hearing my intended destination, one girl exclaimed "Cuandixia is still 40 km away!" This was a revelation. My feeling was that it was 5km away. So not trusting her, i happily poked my head into a tourist office, i passed soon after. "Cuandixia... oh maybe it's 50km further on," said the lady, along w/ some other stuff I couldn't understand.

I was in fact, getting a bit tired already, but figured i'd keep going, and see how far i could get. If need be, i could probably find a hotel somewhere.

I was elated to eventually see a sign reading Zhaitang- 19 km. Zhaitang and Cuandixia are the same place. i pumped those pedals with newfound vigour, and allowed myself more rest stops and pauses to shoot the scenery.

But it turned out that Cuandixia is just a part of Zhaitang. Arriving in Zhaitang means that there was only about 10 more km to get to my destination. i plodded on. Traffic and people were nil. The sky was totally black. Street lights were few. Luckily i had a bike light.

i arrived in Cuandixia at 6:30, took the first room available and pigged out on the overpriced meal that the guesthouse offered.

i figured i deserved a day of rest and to explore the area a bit, before heading bk to BJ. i spent the next day attempting to summit a mountain, giving up both times after getting tantalizingly close. But it also dawned on me that i'm not covered by insurance, and the one mountain face was getting pretty dodgy. the next time my scratched and scarred body gave up in the face of 300m more of dense thorny bushes and trees.

So instead i found a spot to sit, had a toke, and sat there for a long long time enjoying the quiet.

Then went back to town. Ate dinner. Smoked more. Got a beer. went back to my room, and studied mandarin, then watched a show about raising camels. That was a great evening.

Apart from a flat tire, riding back was like lightning. Fast Times at Zhaitang High(way). Five hours return. Plus stops to eat and poke around.

Lessons: Don't calculate distance based on 20km/hrs. Climbing mountains is more like 5km/hr. Install gears on bike before next long trip. Don't forget your patch kit on the stairs at home, dumbass!

Jojo Mayer

2011-10-14T20:13:00.000-07:00

Having established himself drumming w/ the likes of Dizzy Gillespie and Nina Simone, Mayer has been hammering out drum and bass riffs for a long time since. I caught him last night in a performance w/ his three-piece group Nerve.

The hype in the sardine-packed joint was tangible, and Mayer's riffs inspired people to hoot and holler throughout the set. Even though there were a couple of times when the music seemed pretty holycrapthisongisolamespeciallytheterriblekeyboard but at other times, my jaw was on the floor wondering how Mayer was producing beats that usually require supercomputer-generated algorithms, and my best efforts couldn't keep me from busting out a bit.

A Very Important Number

2011-10-11T19:26:00.000-07:00

37 is a scintillating prime number, the fifth lucky prime, the first irregular prime, the third unique prime and the third cuban prime of the form

It is, of course, a factor of all 3-digit base 10 repdigits, such as 111. 37 is the smallest prime that is not also a supersingular prime. It is a centered hexagonal number and a star number!

And did you know that 37 and 38 are the first pair of consecutive positive integers not divisible by any of their digits???

And 37 is a Størmer number! (Since the greatest prime factor of 372 + 1 = 1370 is 137, which is obviously more than 37 twice). How cool is that?

And surely you're fascinated to know that 37 is the only two digit number in base 10 whose product, when multiplied by two, subtracted by one, and then read backwards, equals the original two digit number: 37×2=74, 74-1=73, 73 backwards is 37!

And you probably already knew that 37 is the only two digit number in base 10 with the following property: The difference between the two digits equals the square root of the difference between the number itself and the least common multiple of the two digits!

Today i'm going to try to be the me i want to be.

Info courtesy of wikipedia. Embellishments courtesy of the author

Thanksgiving

2011-10-10T07:19:00.001-07:00

To Whom It May Concern,

I'm thankful for:

-a girlfriend who loves me.

-family and friends near and far who love me, and whom I can love as well.

-air to breathe, food to eat, water to drink. Polluted or not, it's still a godsend.

-the opportunities i've had to travel.

-a job on the horizon.

-a job behind me finished.

-bicycles.

-Google Chrome Translator.

-Dan Savage.

-tofu.

-cheap prices and knockoffs in China.

-decent food at dirt cheap prices in China.

-entertainment luxuries available to me that 95% of Beijingers can only dream of.

-a principal who'll write me a ref letter despite how I "quit" after i got my visa.

-more and more understanding about how immature i am.

-the bit of equanimity I have now and again.

-a body that works pretty darn good.

-people fighting for stuff I'm too lazy about (Occupy Wall St).

-Skype.

-weed.

-the weird fact that some people still read this blog!

-that means you, numskull ;)

Forget About Education

2011-10-06T20:47:00.000-07:00

A while ago, i had an interview w/ China Radio International. I hyped my time blogging for Beyond Robson, said some charming stuff, whipped out some photos of Japan to impress the guy, spent 1hr+ proving my salt as an editor (rewriting a disgustingly badly written article about internet dating in China), and did a voice test in the studio. I was told i'd get a call in a few days. Which i didn't.

About a week later i called CRI and was informed that i got the job. Well sort of. I got offered the package. The boss guy said it could be January before i actually start working. Because there's all this documentation required that i need to gather. Health check, letter of reference, Canadian criminal record check (which is a HUGE mof'ing hassle to get done from here)... and then apparently after documentation's provided, things're still slow on that end.

Anyhow: the job is for a Copy Editor with some journalist duties, and also i'll likely do some radio production and even photography for them. Articles to be written about arts, culture, and travel. In fact, there's no job for me to fill, but after looking at my credentials, the guy thinks there's room in the budget to take me on in order to improve the product of CRI's English program and website.

Hard to ask for a sweeter intro into the world of media. It won't pay much, but it's livable for China. Shit, i'm really exiting my former chosen career in education! Oh baby. We had our times, kids.

Oh, and also this is state-owned media, but produced for people outside of China. This gives us a bit more freedom, but there's no denying the hilarious fact that I'll be employed by the CHINESE GOVERNMENT! Well, there ya go, kids. Whodathunkit.

Detonate Intellectual War

2011-10-02T23:14:00.001-07:00

I bought a can of walnut drink the other day. Quite tasty. Supposedly good for the brain. Marketed towards students.

I ignored the third word of the text which said it was Pulped Walnut Latex Product.

But below that, it stated quite beautifully: "POWER: Detonate Intellectual War."

Not quite sure what that meant, but I knew I had to drink it.

Bamboozled

2011-10-02T22:58:00.000-07:00

China has a reputation for producing knock offs. Fake iPhones, fake Gucci bags, fake baby food, you name it.. There's also a lot of fake alcohol. Even a 60 cent bottle of 40% baijiu can be fake. Shots of tequila from the bar taste like tequila but they don't pack the same punch. Unless you're in a swank spot, it's always safer to stick to beer.

The other night i felt like drinking scotch, which i haven't had in a long time. So i went to buy a bottle from an int'l grocery store, but Qianqian advised me that the Russian convenience store would be cheaper.

It wasn't, but the selection was better. So i was able to choose a bottle of Glenfiddich single malt scotch, which was about CAD $40. Fine. My dad will be in BJ before long, so I don't want to disappoint him with Johnny Walker Red Label.

Upon returning home, I poured a couple glasses, toasted w/ my brother, and enjoyed. Mm good. But not that good. Sometimes i really enjoy my drink and other times not. But really. This should've tasted better than that. It tasted ok, in fact, but definitely did not taste like 40%. I was disappointed. Q said i should take it back and graciously offered to accompany me.

We went down to the store w/ a glass in hand, and said, “It's fake. We don't want it. You try it. Can we get our money back please?”

“No. It's real.”

“No, it's not. I've drank this before. It's not the same.” (Although my brain was actually struggling to recall whatever Glenfiddich tasted like).

A supervisor came in. Telephone calls were made. One converstion included suspicious information such as “He' a foreigner. In his 20s. Maybe a student.” I realized I shouldn't have dressed so casually.

We were told that the bottle would be sent for a quality control check up. It could take a week or so before we were notified of the result.

It was turning into too much hassle. I suggested to Q that we forget it and split, (to which she commented I was being a nerd).

She told them said we'd handle it tonight or she'd call the police. She said to me, “You're 100% sure it's fake, so why should you be worried?” To myself I thought, “Only 85% sure, actually.”

So what could happen? They send it off for quality check. Somebody says, “Sorry it's real,” and that's the end of it. I was scared that my tastebuds were going to be put to the test.

Five minutes later, a full refund was silently slipped onto the counter, which we pocketed before slipping out.

Success! I wasn't stuck w/ a $40 bottle of mystery scotch. We had beat the system. Or rather, Q had. She was admittedly annoyed that I had considered ducking out, after I had dragged her into the situation. But in her mind, of COURSE we'd get the money back, from this store which was totally loaded with illegally imported and untaxed goods. Well. What would the foreigner know about how things work?

The lesson: don't buy booze (cheap OR expensive) from the sketchy Russian store. Or other sketchy establishments, for that matter.

Life After Teaching

2011-09-22T21:45:00.000-07:00

Hey gang,
Well, at the conclusion of last June, I was officially unemployed. However, before I'd gotten back to Beijing, a friend of mine who does voice work in BJ knew some guy who was looking for writers to create ESL oral tests. So I put on the tie, and did the interview where I sounded totally overconfident in my capabilities.

I did a rough calculation of my hourly wage from last year, and asked them to match 118rmb/hour. They said sure. Then i realized that $18/hr isn't that much, and holy shit, is that all i was making last year?

So i emailed the boss, asking for 200rmb/hr. "Sorry I miscalculated." And he said... okay. Wow.

Part time i've been writing dialogues and questions and editing other stuffs. Correcting enviromental misinformation whenever necessary. "Actually, the cows don't destroy the grasslands. It's just farmers who naturally accept payment to raise cattle," etc etc.

But.

This job's been just a handful of hrs/wk.

So i've kept myself busy by playing music and painting. Yay.

And also doing some writing along the side, some of which looks pretty good, but i haven't submitted any of it to anyone. My bad.

And also i've sent out some resumes.

Had an interview yesterday at Radio China International. That would be rad. But i ought not to talk much about it yet. If i get confirmation on it, i'll wax poetic. So in the meantime, you can wish me well if you so desire.

Eurotrip Part 2

2011-09-07T08:06:00.000-07:00

Hopped on a train to Bratislava. Woke up on said train and was informed that Bratislava stop was 100km back. Jumped off at Brno and convinced an angry girlfriend that Brno was a nice place to spend a night. Which it was. Forked out a lot of money on a swank medieval style hotel, strolled the car-free cobblestoned downtown core, and ate a pork hock the size of an overinflated football.

Bratislava – boring renovated castle, touristy old town, great hipster band, one Jazzanova DJ, and one drunken couple who seemingly tried to proposition us into swinging, which we opted against.

Convinced by the large number of recommendations to visit Vienna, Austria, we veered off to Vienna, Austria. Jaws on the floor, to witness such ubiquitous sculptural precision and emotion on public display. Statues are great. Stone statues of embattled people transforming into writhing sea creatures are so next level. Prominent galleries which prove that Gustav Klimt and Egon Schiele did much greater things than decorate yuppy living rooms. The world's undisputed best apple strudel. The city that Mozart himself chose for his freelance years. The place is f'ing civilized.

Prague. Never seen a city so well preserved in my life. Sure, it's touristified, but the winding maze of roads and historic architecture, and the wonderful absence of modern buildings creates a real feeling of going back in time. A tourist packed cathedral which still manages to bring tears to the eyes. Obviously , everyone says, “It was better before,” which it undoubtedly was, but the place still deserves to be prioritized among European destinations.

Berlin. Second time for Qianqian and I, and we stayed w/ my brother's friend and her bf (who i got on w/ rather well). He and i went out for beers in a sweet little living room of a club when our gf's were too tired to deal w/ us. After about 3 wks of travelling attached at the hip, Q and i eventually had a fight, where we both act like immature kids, and ended up taking separate routes in the gallery for the day. I take a full 50% of the responsibility. I need to voice my issues earlier instead of letting stuff stew in my gut to the point where i can't deal w/ stuff rationally anymore. Also got to meet up w/ my punk guitarist friend Matthias, who i hadn't seen in 6 years. He's still shredding. Berlin, if you don't know, is cool. Not overcool, but very cool. It's also “the poorest” city in Germany, as all the artists and indies go there. Organized, and efficient, but the DIY attitude is still in full effect. Spent rather too much time “shopping” w/ the gf, but did get to see lots of different chunks of the city.

So.

Eastern Europe is def underrated. Good to hang out w/ Gavin and Abe (and we didn't even rehash our drug laden university days). Totally happy to witness Abe and Judit's wedding. Also in three weeks i had more meat than i've eaten in the last three years. That coupled with the daily beer consumption created a small beer belly on my skinny body.

Back in Beijing now: meditate. Read a book about buddhism to start being the Buddhist that i officially am. Run / bike / swim more. Get a job.

Eurotrip Part 1 – Budapest

2011-09-04T08:43:00.000-07:00

Budapest – totally cool city in a way that's predictably totally different from Beijing cool. Lots of cool hipster areas, Banksy graffiti, and artsy bars. And century old cafe culture. Qianqian and I had the good fortune of being invited out to Budapest for friends Abe and Judit's wedding, and got to hang out w/ them a decent amount.

The bachelor party: Sziget Music Festival. Well this one choked Q. She'd already stated she wanted to go to Sziget to see the Chemical Brothers, who happened to be playing the day of the boys' party. However the boys' party was for the boys, and she had another (slightly less wild) party to attend.

A gang of about ten guys, mostly new to me, had a rather spectacularly entertaining day/night. All members quite drunk. Nobody too drunk. Tons of ADD distractions provided by Sziget such as badminton, tight rope walking, machine bull riding, and others we didn't get around to like zip lining, bars in the sky, karaoke, bungee jumping, yadda yadda.

But mostly when I think of Sziget I think about the Crystal Castles performing in some massive black tent. Everytime I listen to Crystal Castles at home, my bro or gf tells me to turn it off because it's too intense. I admit, I too had never listened to the entire album. But i had a feeling they'd be mad live. And they were. Or at least the show was. Not once did I really even see them. (I admit I shot a video which showed a lot more than anything I witnessed during the show, that's for sure). I just saw a lot of fog and a strobe light and was crushed amongst thousands of people yelling, screaming, and jumping up and down. I had a full beer in my hand which I was inadvertently splashing all over everyone around me, so I tried to gulp it down as fast as possible, sloshing a large portion of it over my chest and more on bystanders. Anyhow. It's pretty insane how you can get totally caught up in the mad focus of such a huge mass of people.

Here's the vid that I shot. Oh yeah.

The wedding was great too. Lots and lots of artsy types as the bride's father was an artist, the bride is an artist, the groom is an artist, and they studied in school w/ a bunch of artists. Never before have i been asked “Are you a graphic designer?” so many times in a night.

The bride was beautiful in her dress, cape and shoes. Shoes which I had formerly seen and thought, “Uh, you made those crazy shoes for your WEDDING???” The wedding ceremony was sweet and simple and brought tears to my eyes. The dinner and speeches were all quite entertaining, despite the periodic translations.

And then there was the party. A band played some traditional songs, some Velvet Underground, and other dance hits. The bride was “kidnapped” and had to be woo'd back by the groom's impromptu epic performance of an epic indie love song he penned years ago.

Anyhow, admittedly me and Q ducked out earlier than others, and hence missed swimming, people forced to eat by losing pingpong, and the DJ angrily packing out after being upstaged by the groom's brother. Fun.

The rest of Hungary: swimming at the lake w/ the wedding party. Me and Q checking out art galleries, castles, and cathedrals, and a small serving of mushrooms.

Stay tuned for more on Slovakia, Austria, Czech Republik and the Deutscheland...

A Brief Meditation Retreat

2011-08-04T20:34:00.000-07:00

Scooted out to the outskirts of the city for a 4 day meditation retreat. My friend Yuqi works at this Buddhist centre which is NOT a meditation retreat centre, but he said i could spend some time there. Two Tibetan lamas had just vacated the place, so i didn't have to sleep on a couch.

Too bad, I just missed this one 26 yr old lama who is apparently the 7th incarnation of some important lineage, and all these people were bustling to pay their respects. Yuqi was impressed by the number of China's filthy rich who were present to pay homage.

One lama was still around. He struck me as a slightly grumpy fellow, and I was amused to hear the sound of television commercials sneaking out of his bedroom. "Don't judge," I ineffectively advised myself.

Anyhow.

Nice place. i was informed (several times) i shouldn't pay anything to stay; just help out.

In the end, i didn't get in half as much sitting as i'd hoped. i was busy cleaning and resetting hundreds of candle jars.

And one day we went out to purchase $300 worth of fish, eels, frogs and turtles to be released in a lake to celebrate the anniversary of Buddha's first teaching. We went to some fish market drenched in horrible stink and selected the lucky SOB's who would taste freedom for the second (first?) time. A couple workers lugged our blue bags of fish, amphibians, reptiles and chunks of ice into a van and headed out to the lake with us.

“Hey Yuqi, if we buy these fish, then the store will just be happy and buy more fish to sell, right?”
“Yes, this is a problem.” Yuqi redirects to how these fortunate few turtles were saved from having their bellies sliced open, clawing the air as their blood spouts into a pot of boiling broth before being plopped whole into the pot for a writhing public execution.

“Do these workers think we're weird that we're buying these fish to set them free?”
“No. After the cultural revolution this is a common Buddhist practice.”
Oh.

And of course i had reviewed carefully in my head the dangers of introducing non-native species into local ecosystem and shared my insight.
“Oh yes. Food chain...” Yuqi gave a rather insufficient explanation of how these species wouldn't fuck things up so bad, but i didn't press my case.

At the lake, the lama led the present Buddhists in five minutes of prayer before pouring some blessed water into the squirming bags which were carefully lined along the sandy bank.

It was cool to see those turtles sprint out of the bag and swim into the depths out of sight. I dedicated the turtles' liberation to that poor bugger back in the mandarin school. The frogs who were clawing their way up the walls of the bag were less climactic to watch. Once they'd tasted the air and sun and water they seemed content to lounge. Which is fine, but the few frogs who didn't survive the journey sadly tainted the scene with their limp limbs and pale bellies.

The next day, i had offered to cook dinner since at the centre there seemed to be some interest in western cuisine. Oh! You like potatoes! Fried potatoes! That was their understanding. I concocted a menu of mushroom cream pasta, salad, and (for them) potatoes.

However the list of ingredients i'd requested weren't all available. Nobly, I held my tongue and said, “Great! No problem.” I prepared the meal for seven, which admittedly was not stellar. The lama in particular seemed unable to eat what i'd prepared. Others smiled and said “Delicious!” Internally i rolled my eyes and said a not insincere “thanks.” My suspicions were later confirmed when later bottled peaches and apricots were bust out to ensure the lama or anybody else didn't go to bed hungry. However, in fact i think i did a decent job at trying my best to make a decent meal, and in not beating myself up so much when it didn't pan out according to plan.

On my last day there, some cute woman arrived to attend the lamas' prayers. As soon as i saw her, i felt conflicted. In general i avoided her and made evasive comments before going off to whatever i was going to do. Later we ended up working together cleaning more candle jars. She was super friendly and interesting, explaining about how she had turned to Buddhism after she was diagnosed with cancer, and survived the experience. It was all pretty fascinating, but i did my best to stay somewhat aloof 'cause i thought she may be interested in me. Anyhow, I need to figure out how to be open and friendly with open and friendly people while keeping within appropriate boundaries. In the end I think I probably came off as a touch rude. Sorry, lady.

I sat less than 1/2 the hours i'd planned, and certainly did't get to the depth of meditations i'd hoped for, but coming home afterwards, i disembarked the subway and walked through Beijing alleyways while listening to a guided meta (loving kindness) mp3, and could feel this field of positivity emanating from my core as i strolled along. But I still avoided eye contact w/ passers by. Just in case.

Up Up and Away

2011-07-31T17:46:00.000-07:00

Well, sort of.

Here's my unsuper recap of summer.

Mandarin class wrapped up surprisingly quickly. I wrote the school an email and talked to some lady about the turtle who lives in an aquarium that's far too small for him, and lives a life of utter boredom and discontent, but it doesn't look like they're gonna do anything about it.

The class itself was ok, and met some nice foreigners who all speak roughly the same level of chinese as me (except that i was by far the illiterate one). And i also would have preferred a teacher who was more of a Nazi. Less friendly chit chat, and more Today we MUST get through exercises A, B, C, D and E!

Watched a bunch of vids and movies w/ my gf, who's worked as much as ever through this rainy, hot July. Transformers got slaughtered by the critics, but i thought it was pretty refreshing after the abysmal part 2. I won't tell you why, in case you go and see it. But it does some interesting historical reinterpretation.

Also: The Hangover. Pretty f'ing funny. Don't read the back of the DVD box first, if you can. Really.

And then: today i'm of to some buddhist place for a 4 day retreat. Although i'm sure the place isn't set up as a retreat centre, and there's a possibility i may be sleeping on a couch. Which is fine.

Then back for a couple days, whereupon me and Q will throw our lives into suitcases for a few weeks. YES she got the visa! So we'll be off to Budapest, Hungary for Abe and Judit's wedding. Then off solo to explore Hungary, Slovakia, Czech Republic, and Germany. Yes, it'll be a busy few weeks.

And then i'll return to a jobless life in BJ, whereupon i'm hoping that my ex-employer forgets that they gave me that 1 year visa, and DON'T cancel it leaving me an illegal resident who could get kicked out of the country forever more.

i don't expect it to come to that.

Expect more scintillating updates upon my return, dedicated readers!

Crazy summer MADNESS!!!

2011-07-21T23:58:00.000-07:00

Well this is summer alright.
Beijing's hot and peculiarly humid. Admittedly this is my 1st July spent in town, so I'm not sure if all these sporadic torrential thundershowers are the norm.

Unbelievably, it seems like July is already drawing to a close, and what've i got to show for it? Well, i've been in mandarin classes for 3 hrs/day, 3 days/week. And that's been ok, although i'd frankly like to see yet more rapid improvement.

I've sloppily recorded most of the guitar songs i've ever written so i don't need to worry about forgetting any more of them.

i went running once. Did a bit of writing.

and...?

This is a disappointingly small list of accomplishments for 3 weeks. Yes, i'll be off to Eastern Europe in August, but what can i do to exploit my time here?

Intentions:
finish the painting i started 8 months ago.
Visit Fragrant Hills area.
Visit Temple of Heaven area.
Get something published on a local website.

Q is working all summer long, including some wkends, so trips out of town aren't too feasible. I kind of want to get her out more, but i know that when i was teaching i sure as hell didn't want stay up past 11:05...

In the beginning of August i'll hopefully skip out for a 4 day self-guided meditation retreat.

Also, i'm unsure about the plans for next year. After politely saying thanks but no thanks to my employer about working next year (right after i received the 1 year working visa from them), they contacted me twice to ask me to reconsider.

i had actually said that i decided not to teach FT next year, and now they just asked what that would look like. And that if I don't work for them, they'll recall my work visa. With a sigh, i responded politely saying that of course i'd be happy to work 3 days/wk.

We'll see what happens.

The Hits of Yesterday

2011-07-02T20:05:00.000-07:00

I remember before I'd left Canada for China, I asked a Chinese (from China) girl about biking in China. Is it dangerous? I'll need to get a helmet... She informed me, "If you wear a helmet in China, people will think you're... special." But it didn't take long on the roads of Beijing to realize that a helmet's not a bad idea.

I've witnessed numerous collisions involving bikes (only one involving a head injury), and had a few instances of forgettable contact myself.

Yesterday was my first real accident. Chill. I got off scot-free. Zero employment of my helmet.

It wasn't yet late, but the sky was already black. I was finishing up a rare recreational bike ride, and was 1 minute from arriving home.

I raced ahead to catch the green turning light, noting the approaching taxi who was turning into my lane. No problem, he'll see me. Generally speaking drivers somehow manage to find the brake pedal in time, regardless of the unpredictable shit that foggy drivers and pedestrians thrust in their path.

But this time he didn't see me. I yelled at him at full volume, thinking that my left leg could be on the brink of some serious pain. Then he hit, slamming on the brakes milliseconds later than preferable. I found myself amazingly having landed on my feet, completely unscathed. But the adrenalin at least got me to start yelling at this guy in broken chinese. "I have a green light! You are wrong!" He apologetically concurred that he was busy looking the other way.

A few people stopped to watch, before puttering on. This wasn't serious enough to garner a proper crowd.

I made a show of whipping out a red pen and writing down his license number on my arm. The driver was worried. But elated that I wasn't hurt. And that even the bike seemed alright. It did seem to be strangely untouched. The way things are handled in China, you could call the cops, but both parties usually prefer to take of their own business with one party passing cash to the other.

So i contemplated: 200rmb maybe? 100? But as the adrenaline receded I started to think about the life of the average cabby, the 14-24 hr shifts, dealing w/ drunks and idiots, relentless traffic and ubiquitous bonehead drivers...

Ok, ok, ok. You go. He smiled and pumped my hand with both of his. "Xiexie xiexie xiexie!" Yeah yeah, no problem.

I hopped on my bike and realized that it wasn't exactly riding properly. Eventually i realized the car had struck exactly one place on my bike: the side of the pedal. Thus warping the crank and/or bottom bracket. I groaned wondering if this was gonna cost me some coin. In the end it did: 5 kuai. Or 80cents to get it bent back into shape.

The end.

Lesson: use your front light. It's not useful sitting (conveniently) in your bag, you lazy punk.

Changes and Pivotal Moments

2011-06-22T16:33:00.000-07:00

I may have hinted before that there's been some troubles at the school, and w/ the employer and w/ the public school that my private school is held within. In fact, there's been doubt for quite a while about how my school will cope w/ the falling student numbers (no more enrollment since my school's contract is almost up).

But last week, I was still rather surprised (but not totally surprised) when I was told that there's no job for me next year at the school.

So that kind of annoyed me.

'cuz it's pretty f'ing late in the game to drop that sort of info.

I was told that there are no other guaranteed openings in the other 2 Beijing schools (which immediately struck me as suspicious). But I was told that I'd be first in line to get one, as if continuing the same contract. (Pragmatism advised I should get that in writing, but I didn't).

I was assured they felt terrible about it, and that it had nothing to do w/ my teaching, blah blah.

"But you know that my visa expires in a week. If you're not renewing it, I need to get out of China. I was told when hired on, that the company would take care of all visa issues."

Whereupon I was told that it was no problem, I just had to pop down to Hong Kong and get a tourist visa. No, they wouldn't consider paying for it.

The end.

I realized I didn't care so much about the job, but was rather incensed that I might have to leave the country on super short notice to revamp my visa. I considered the options. "Well sure, actually I'd be happy to move to Xi'an and work at the school there. What an opportunity! And don't forget to renew my visa. Thanks!"

But then I spoke w/ my principal and my last year's principal who said it was bullshit that there were no jobs at the other school. They spoke w/ the employer, and the next day I got a phone call, saying wow there actually is a position available (at the suburban school I was at last year) and could I please bring in my passport and a couple pix so they can do my visa.

Score!

So. Priority #1: taken care of. The situation: possibly working bk in Fengtai district at the old school, commuting maybe 3 hrs/day. Not likely.

More likely: work education jobs part time, possibly subbing, and use this as my opportunity to stop teaching. A decision I made 6 years ago. Because I never was sure I should be a teacher. And don't want to be a mediocre one. And working alongside a great staff this year of teachers who should be teachers, i certainly noted that whenever they talked about LT teaching plans I thought to myself: Well, that's not gonna be me.

I consulted the iching, (which i do now and again) and it said

Keeping Still

Keeping one's back still,
uncaught is one's self.
Walking in the courtyard,
not paying attention to the people.
Without fault.

Not doing something, being unmovable. One does not allow oneself to be influenced by others. This is not a mistake.

Which I think means... meditate. Take my time. Don't listen to what anyone says. BTW, i heartily recommend you check out the iching if you have questions and you wonder what the universe would suggest.

For now... i hope to get my visa bk soon. Then (most likely) tell the school i found something else to do.

July: take mandarin classes.
Aug: did I mention that me and Q are going to Eastern Europe?

Sept: maybe do some part time teaching/tutoring. And start writing. Like writing everyday. A bit scary, but I'll try to do this freelance writer business. See what I can dig up, and see what magazines/newspapers/websites might be interested in using, paying exorbitantly high prices per word.

Yup. Plans are of course flexible. But that's it for now... Wish me luck.

Q goes to Shenzhen

2011-06-04T19:33:00.000-07:00

Q had a business trip in Shenzhen, China's "special economic zone". To oversee production of a promotional bag which uses a design of one of her gallery's artists.
5 days, they said.
But complications turned 5 into 8days. Which was a hassle.
Making bags which use some eco-friendly materials.
But (not surprisingly) the process and facilities which make said bags:
ecologically horrific.
Then she finally arrived bk in Beijing. We went for a dinner which was heavily punctuated with phone calls and messages from people in Beijing and Shenzhen.
10 hours later she was back on a plane to Shenzhen.
For 1 day. Which turned into 2.5.
Tossing all the stuff on the bag she was assigned to oversee.
Using a new design.
Sheesh, no wonder people don't like travelling for business.
This (and other recent conversations)
makes me dwell on the multitude of people who do work which is kind of useless.
Teaching hopefully shows you a bit of progress and utility.

Anyhow, hopefully she's bk soon, since...
today's our 2 yr anniversary!
And we oughta do dinner or something, eh?
Def.

More about The Uj

2011-05-31T05:13:00.000-07:00

So that fight last Fri.
Monday i was totally surprised to see kid S walk into class as per normal.
Turns out the after the cops were called in, the Chinese school was in touch w/ the kid S's rather powerful dad, and decided to concertedly sweep the fight under the carpet.

My coworker C was so pissed off about the event he announced to his class that he didn't want to work in a school where people weren't willing to deal with or even talk about problems. Got everyone to write down what they saw about the incident, and even he was surprised to see how readily and extensively kids put pens to the paper.

Here's what i think happened.

The delivered lunch: inadequate.
Kid S complains disrespectfully to the unpleasant worker.
Worker turns out to b a 15 yr old migrant worker.
Working illegally.
For less than $1/hr.
Serving food to a bunch of rich kids who take their privilege for granted.
Kid S throws a bunch of food trays into the box, making a mess.
By "accident."
Said employee stabs kid X w/ chopsticks.
Kid S punches employee in head, causing swelling.
2 other students rush the employee.
To "break up" the fight.
Slamming his head against the wall.
By accident.
Kid S kicks the box of trays, making a major f'ing mess.
And announces, "nobody saw that."
Worker kid calls the cops and takes himself to a hospital.
But he and the company are threatened with calls to some govt labour office.
That's the end.
Done.

Except us teachers think 3 kids ganged up on some 15 yr old punk is pretty f'ing uncool, and it is clear that a reasonable # of students are also upset by this situation. 5 day suspensions, we decide.

But the chinese school disagrees. We say tough luck, this is a BC school, and those 3 kids can't come in our classes.

Then the 3 kids eventually accept their consequences.

But then the chinese school calls the kids back and tries to FORCE them into my coworker's class in front of a crowd of students. Coworker and Chinese staff member argue. Kid S eventually comes to me (looking quite pathetic at this point) saying he has nowhere to go. He knows he's not supposed to be in C's class, and he doesn't want the chinese staff to find him and make a show of forcing him in. So i let him hide in my class as i teach gr 10s.

He heavily says to me, "i think the teachers have a wrong idea about what happened the other day."
"I'm sure that's true. But i know that people haven't been telling the whole truth." i gave the little liar a bit of a stare-down. Everything this guy says makes himself sound like a gossamer-winged angel.

The 3 students are now feeling pretty shit, not about the fighting necessarily, but about the fact that they're somewhat responsible for a major schism between the 2 "cooperating" schools, teacher and admin stressed out, and Mr R sincerely saying he'll quit or be fired if this stuff can't get settled.

Bottom line: we do what we can to make our school work. The Chinese school does what it can to have power struggles with us, regardless of impact on students. We are disappointed, but not surprised about anything.

Side note: this condensed version somehow doesn't sound quite right, and i'm not sure why.

Also, the pic is just from the internet.

The Uj

2011-05-27T08:07:00.000-07:00

As the detective work of me and my coworker undercovered, it was a day of interest for one of my more charismatic, egocentric gr 11 students.

He was pissed off about the lunch which is delivered to students daily.
A hair was in his food.
He... punched the food employee in the head.
The mean one.
Causing the side of his head to swell up.
The food guy stabbed my student with a pair of disposable chopsticks.
An undisclosed number of food trays were thrown.
An undisclosed number of students didn't receive their lunch.
My student was taken away.

By the police.

As mentioned, this took a bit of sleuthing and coaxing out of other students.
The first response to the query about the food stains on the wall was:
"it was the wind."

Hope my student is still able to finish the school year.
Even if he's a pain in the ass sometimes,
he can still grasp some of the finer points of To Kill a Mockingbird.

Great Wall Marathon #3

2011-05-27T03:35:00.000-07:00

Last year i ran the great wall 1/2 marathon. After crossing the start line i was thinking, "Hey, i should do the full marathon next year." And that seemed like a good idea. However, for the last 3 km of that race my thought had subtly transformed into "Full marathon? What the hell kind of stupidly insane idea is that?"

None the less, this March i decided to overlook that gained wisdom, and did sign up for the full race. And started running 30 min to work most days (in a shirt and modestly striped tie) which was a painful slog of a start to the morning. Then considering the quickly approaching race date, i decided to just switch bk to the 1/2. Even my brother was wisely recommending I drop the full distance.

But then the week before the race day, I figured, Why Not? Why not do the 42k? Why not take my time? Walk as much as I want and not care about the chiseled bodies blurring past...

So i loaded my mp3 player w/ all the requisites: a pumping Japanese DJ, goofy Pizzicato 5 tracks, somber Radiohead ones, comical David Sedaris stories, and my ever present Chinesepod lessons (which incidentally do little to motivate the thighs).

i packed up my bag, peeled myself out of bed.Bit of a rush job actually: forget a visiting the 7-11. Find a taxi. Now. Helloooo, taxi??? I got the recon point and for the 3rd time hopped onto a 3:30am bus off to the Huangyanguan Great Wall. This felt much more respectable than crawling onto the bus after a night of booze and bands as I'd done previously.

Few hours later, i hopped off the bus, and was shocked to find how f'ing cold it was. i was wearing 2 shirts and a pair of vintage bell bottoms which i thought might be more pragmatic than my shorts. Got a hot drink to try and warm up, but my shaking hand kept spilling the coffee all over my wrist. I was not impressed.

Waiting for the sun come up and squeezed into a windless corner w/ a handful of other intrepid runners, i had an opportunity to ask moronic questions like, "How important is breakfast before a full marathon?" After rolling her eyes, a blonde girl was so generous as to toss me a granola bar.

Eventually the sun did make its grand entrance. I hurriedly peeled off down to my running outfit, which announced loudly to my peers "This Guy Isn't A Runner", and huddled into the start line group.

Then we were off. Running, running, running. Running like... turtles. We were a cloud of skinny limbs, gently nudged forward by the breeze. The road zigzagged up the mountain, and the large majority of people around me opted to walk. Sounds good to me. There was a long way to go, why burn out on that stuff? Last year i did the 1/2 in 3 hrs, s. i figured anything under 7 hrs today would be a smashing success.

Once we got on the wall itself, more walking. Waiting. Walking. Single file sometimes.

Then down and running again.

A bit of chitchat w/ a guy from Detroit. Nice enough dude, but in the end we didn't have tons to talk about, and it turned a bit uncomfortable that we continued to keep passing each other. I started keeping my eyes peeled for him so I could either keep ahead or stay behind him. Maybe slip past him at a water station.

The 21 km marker passed, which took it's lazy ass time to show its face, loitering at the crest of a hill. No fanfare, no bananas or water or smiling underage race officials waving you on. But i did notice i felt infinitely better than when i had hurled myself over the finish line last year. Were i not running, i'd have paused for thought.

By this point, my inadequate breakfast was certainly filling my thoughts more than it did my stomach. Confused by the lack of anyone selling chips, chocolate bars or cookies, i would note every tab of plastic littered on the road, indicating that some foreigner had imported and consumed an energy bar or power gel.

Eventually i found a spot to duck into, and wasted a few minutes before deciding on some arrowroot biscuit copycats. Immediately I started popping copious amounts of these delectable wafers into my mouth. Mmm. Mmmm. Strangely melting in the mouth without making it dry or pasty...

Chitchat w/ some southern US girl about hills and stairs. Later i chitchat w/ some guy from the southern US about his cowboy hat and other such miscelanea. For some reason i mention the girl i had just met. "Yeah. That's my girlfriend. You were running 200m ahead of me." Ha. We eventually caught her at a drink station, and i let them lovers be.

Then round 2 on the wall. At this point, there was only about 15k to go. I'd noted earlier that some runners looked like they were dying. Pasty, pale, and sticky. Others looked like they were just plunking along, as if they were a bit late for book club. Not a hair out of place. In fact, I fell in the latter category. So i figured i oughta step it up a bit before i got to the finish line. By this time on the wall, i was passing quite a few people. Notably for me, i was passing quite a few people who looked rather like runners. You know: short shorts and Ts made of synthetics. Belts holding cute little plastic bottles of red gels. As opposed to me in my faded brown cargo shorts and knock-off Astroboy T.

I ran up some stairs since, hell i'd practiced in a few towers beforehand. That seemed to impress a few onlookers. Then it was just about 6km left to the finish line, all paved, all downhill, so i figured i oughta run it w/out stopping. Which was actually pretty hard. But i was passing people like mad which was gold for my ego.

However, when i run really tired, i start breathing strangely loud in a rhythmic Huh-Huh-Huh! Frankly it's quite embarrassing in that unintentional drama queen way. So i tried stifling it into a more subtle Hooh-Hooh-Hooh, in an effort to keep fellow runners from thinking i was some freak who was knocking himself out to pass them. At any rate, i avoided eye contact so as to remain ignorant of their judgement.

i even passed this crazy mofo who had at this point ran 40k in scrappy old SANDALS! Nutbar. i suspect a Thai nutbar. Eat my dust, Thai nutbar.

Anyhow, i crossed the line and felt good. Not good like these other runners who were posing for pictures exultantly holding their medals in the air, but still considerably better than when I almost passed out last year. i almost felt... disappointed. All that expectation. All that fear about my shorts chaffing my legs into bloody welts (which i've seen on runners before). Sure, there were some people waddling around like elderley mallards and a few limpers. But my body seemed anticlimactically...fine. No vomit. No seized muscles the next day. Nada.

Final time: 6hrs, 15 min. Not bad! Plunked me down somewhere in the middle of the finishers. I gloated a bit 'cause I beat sponsored team runners in their fancy outfits. After I checked the times and my placing, i felt like next time i shouldn't putz around taking pictures, purchasing stuff, or popping into buddhist temples and feeling forced by monks to make donations. (Yeah. i did that).

Next year? Maybe. Truth is, the race is kind of a monetary rip off, but it is one of the few ways for me to muster up the energy to exercise. Well there's also the BJ marathon in Sept, which i'll pbly do later. They say a regular marathon is a piece of cake compared to the great wall. Maybe. It also seems considerably less interesting to run 42k of polluted flat city roads. We'll see.

Anyhow, for now, it's shoes in the closet, and back on 2 wheels.

Bad News for A.W.W., and Friends

2011-04-24T06:39:00.000-07:00

A couple days ago, the news report below was released from a Chinese news source, however, any time it was released, it was blocked shortly afterwards. Like sometimes within minutes of posting. So people repost it, and then it gets blocked again.

I've been following the situation w/ A.W. reasonably closely as A.W. and Qianqian are friends (she worked under him for a time, and went Germany w/ him as part of a project).

Anyhow, A.W.'s been captured by police, and then AFTERWARDS they went to his house to come up with charges and evidence to prosecute him with. Now the news piece below was released, which talks about a rather horrific torturing method, and i really really hope it didn't come to that w/ A.W..

This story in general certainly affects the amount of respect i can give the government here. Yeah, shit happens in America, and no doubt Canadians have also done sickening things in Iraq or other places, but this is the issue that's occupying my mind more these days.

Important Note: i assume this piece of news hasn't surfaced on any major western news sources because the source pbly isn't verifiable. So perhaps i'm guilty of hearsay. i hope i am.

Side Note: it kinda makes me feel nervous to post about the artist A.W. now, so have taken his name off the page. Q reminds me and my brother when we use the phone, not to use his name when using Skype. Creepy times.

Chinese artist A.W. , disappeared by the authorities on April 3, is reported to have confessed to charges of tax evasion after being tortured in custody, according to an article published in aChinese human rights journal.

The details of the case, said to have been leaked by “an official with conscience in the Ministry of Public Security,” were published on April 21 EST in a text titled “The Alarming Conspiracy Behind A.W's Torture and Confession,” dated April 19, in the biweekly journal of the NGO Human Rights in China (HRIC). The article claims to be written by an anonymous Xinhua journalist and was in the “Letters from China” section.

The text says that Fu Zhenghua, Director of the Beijing Municipal Public Security Bureau, instructed A.W.'s captors to show him the video of the torture of Gao Zhisheng, a human rights lawyer who was targeted by the authorities after writing letters in protest of the persecution of Falun Gong.

The video showing Gao being tortured, “included electric batons being inserted into Gao’s anus, and his blood, semen, feces, and urine draining out,” a translation of the first paragraph of the article says.

Fu Zhenghua ordered that security forces do the same things to A.W., to “make him do what we want him to do.” The text says that, after being tortured for several days, A.W. signed a confession.

A.W.'s case is being handled by the Economic Investigation General Unit and the Domestic Security Team of the Beijing Municipal Public Security Bureau, the article says.

He Qinglian, a commentator on Chinese social and political issues, believes the reports of torture are credible. “I had thought about that when he was first detained,” she told Radio Free Asia inan interview. “You have to realize that he is the only one who dares to mock the authoritarian regime.”
When A.W.'s older sister Gao Ge saw the news, RFA reports, she said “I cannot let my mother see.”
She had no way of knowing the truth of the report, she said; they are going to ask the authorities to clarify the matter.

The journal's editorial policy says that they welcome submissions from a wide variety of sources. HRIC did not comment to The Epoch Times on whether they believe the article by the alleged Xinhua reporter to be credible or not.

Sit On It

2011-04-20T05:52:00.000-07:00

So for... a couple... years maybe, i've wanted to have a meditation group in BJ. Since i've kinda missed my meditation gang DIY Dharma in Vancouver, which basically amounted to the best gang of people to meet up w/ and sit around with in silence.

So, i searched around town, but only found 1 meditation group offered. But i rather didn't dig it. It was just me and the host (a young Chinese woman) and we listened to some guided meditation track which (ironically enough) i detested so much i could barely keep from cringing throughout.

How un-detached of me.

So i've recently put out my own call out on a local expat-driven website, and had a few responses. The first official meeting one British woman came out, plus my brother (who announced that he'd have to leave after 20 min). Anyhow, no prob.

The nxt wk a young woman came who brought 2 friends plus 2 roommates. Plus a few others. 3 were meditation newbies, and afterwards it appeared that none of them found any great love for meditation.

Ah well, Q's never been a big fan either. Hey, diff strokes for diff folks. Although it is a shame that i'm not able to share this with her.

Anyhow, after a few weeks, it seems to have potential to grow, (which i don't care about much), and stabilize (which will be great).

and hopefully i can attract more experienced mediators who can take a turn at leading now and again.

Instructions and surrounding conversation bits tend to be ... about 1/2 English, 1/2 mandarin. which is a bit odd, but everyone seems to scrape by w/ minimal translations.

Anyhow, last night 5 of us were pretty darn focused, and after i finally rang the last bell (xylophone, actually), i started getting bored waiting for everyone to snap out of it. Stop blissing out, folks, it's almost my bedtime!

Well, that's my Tues night agenda for the next indeterminate length of time. i definitely feel its benefit, and hope that benefit can stretch out into the surrounding days and nights before long.

Be happy.

And quit wasting so much time online.

Tianjin, Yet Again

2011-04-08T03:48:00.000-07:00

Q and i went to Tianjin for a little holiday recently. It's only 35 min away via hi-speed rail but it is def a diff city. Um, you may recall i've visited it before a few times.

i still say BJ is better 'cause the new stuff's newer and the old stuff's older. But when i got a 3 day wkend, i get itchy feet.

So despite TJ's mediocrity, we had a pretty darn good time. 1st night we were looking for a bar, and got directed on a bit of a goosechase which wound up in what was essentially a massive packed nightclub except that it didn't have a dancefloor. Save for a mini stage replete w/ dancing bunny girls.

The dancing bunny girls reminded me too much of when a few of my own gr 10 students did a disturbingly sexed out dance performance.

Also the pumped dancing bartenders were pretty entertaining too.

Some guys did some live vocals which were passable. but in the end, the music went from not so bad to pretty darn bad, and we weren't able to finish our couple beers before vacating the premises.

Next day: walk walk walk walk and wound up in the TV tower rotating restaurant. Pix to follow soon.

Anyhow, it was good to a little trip out w/ the gf and things are going pretty good all in all. Sure, there's wrinkles in the fabric, but i've never been one to iron shirts, have i?

Victorious Anticlimax

2011-03-29T05:17:00.000-07:00

Several semi-secret meetings later.
Meetings with the Chinese public school, that is.
Who's attempting to sway us teachers to the Red side of the force.
And they just may come up with a big enough wad of cash to do so.
And there was some rather hard to believe updates from our own school.
Like, "Oh, it turns out we're not going (to the new location) after all."
Then getting a super rare email from one of the owners:
"7/10 chances that we're going."
Then we had more meetings w/ the Chinese school.
Our own employer undoubtedly aware of them.
And when we finally got back to asking our own school what the sitch is,
today,
they said the school's not doing a middle-of-the-term switch to the boondogs
after all.
Because they asked parents and parents weren't keen.
Even though the last report was that they asked parents
who were supportive of the switch
(um, yeah right).
Highly doubtful that any parents were ever notified about the situation
and highly likely that they reconsidered when us teachers kicked up such a stink.
Me, far from being the instigator on that count.
i really oughta be less passive.
Anyhow.
This is GREAT news for teachers and students.
We finish the year w/out dividing the student body,
or fucking everything else up royally.
And in fact
it kinda leaves us teachers in a better position than we were in before
'cause now we've got 2 schools giving us options for next year.
We expect a peek at the public school contract in a wk or so.
but it'll have to look pretty darn good
if it's gonna tempt us to take on the risk and stress of a new uncertified school.

But it would be, at least, downtown.

Another Gig

2011-03-25T21:53:00.000-07:00

Last week was another of Yuqi's gigs, and he asked me last week to open. i admit i was hesitant, since in fact i got kinda stressed last time and didn't dig it too much. Anyhow i consented to play "3 or 4" songs since i'd have no time to practice that week.

Day of the gig i finally chose a handful of songs to play, and practiced for a little while.

Then come performance time, i made oodles of mistakes from my get go intro piece (on the piano: ha!), and throughout. But i really didn't care that much about it. Pbly helped a bit from the beer previously consumed, but also, the bar was full of people just hanging out for a drink, as opposed to paying for a ticket.

Anyways it was pretty fun. After the band played me and Yuqi sort of jammed a bit (and i'm a shitty jammer), later joined by the keyboard player. It was cool, even if it dind't all sound so good.

There's no denying i sing off key way too often.

I should mention that Yuqi invited me to actually join his band. This is pretty crazy considering that he and most of the band are, like, professional. He said i could play a little Korg keyboard or something. "But you already have a keyboard player." "But James is a professional player, who's studied music a lot. You're an untrained Canadian indie musician. It's totally different." Well i guess there's something to that.

I figure i shouldn't be a chicken shit, and be intimidated out of the kind of music opportunity that rarely avails itself to hacks like me. So anyhow, I'll talk to him soon about it.

Also, Epiphone gave him a super sweet (and pricey) guitar which he offered to sell me for 1/2 of what its worth. I wonder if getting a rad guitar would actually entice me bk into songwriting fervor, or would it mostly just gather dust like my present guitar does? (I usually just play my xylophone these days. Really.)

Anyhow, for those interested, here's one of Yuqi's videos, so you can get a feel for his flavour.

Potential Job Upheaval

2011-03-23T06:25:00.000-07:00

For the record, i'd just like to say that it's disturbingly true. It's all about money.

There's not really any moral higher ground in choosing my school or the Chinese school. It's a scrap. Both sides have the gloves off.

You know i always have said that $'s not my key thing, but now i'm part of a group and money is the key thing. Because it'll be a shit show either way, but people will be more willing to put up with a shit show that pays, seeing as how people have already put up with shit shows w/out proper pay.

So i find myself in the boat where dollars and cents will be the closest approximation i can get to respect, freedom, and happiness.

That feels kinda wrong, don't it.

The Smartest Guys In the Room... Maybe.

2011-03-18T20:39:00.000-07:00

CRRRAAAZY times at work.

1st, staff of us 4 teachers are informed that we're being "pushed" out of the Chinese public school, and will relocate. In like 2 weeks. To a beautiful new school which is in Beijing, but definitely NOT downtown Beijing. Students and parents not yet informed. Expectation that some will follow us out to the boonies. Not a word about compensation, no apology, no direct word from our employer or anything. Told to keep our mouths shut about this. Prepare for the impending midnight run.

But.

It didn't really add up. How were we being pushed out? Why?

Oh, the public school, which is responsible to pay our wages was withholding payments, and so my employer the private school had to pay out of pocket? That was right good of them.

But that doesn't add up either. Why was all this info withheld? What's the reason behind the public school's actions?
particularly badly
Much to our employer's displeasure we called a meeting w/ the Chinese public school admin, where we found out they have completed all payments, and are mostly interested in hiring us teachers directly when the present contract expires in June.

Meaning:
Our present employer is using the students as pawns and forcing students, parents and teachers all into a pretty fucking unpleasant situation of a mid-term relocation, sure to break the student body in 1/2, and screw things up tragically for the grade 12ers who've been preparing for final exams for 3.5 years now. The school is doing so to force the kids into the new school, build the new school culture and (imo) slap the Chinese public school in the face.

However.

Once us teachers figured this out, we realized that there's a fight going on over students and TEACHERS. So now us 4 teachers have called private meetings with the public school to see if we can actually wrangle a better deal and future contract. And we gave a list of demands to our present employer, who is doubtlessly pissed OFF.

Note: all teachers have at most scant traces of respect for present employer, and we all feel (even me) that we each have a bad relationship w/ her, and feel a real lack or respect from her.

Although to be fair, there has been no shortage of problems caused by the Chinese school either.

Anyhow, it's pretty exciting to be in a situation where we fought to figure out what was happening and squeezed ourselves into a better position.

Or we could all lose our jobs and end up with nothing.

But there's definite power in being a unified core, and knowing that many students would consider that WE are the school, not whatever f'ing name or company it's under. And knowing that we have already proven ourselves, improving all aspects of school life and exam marks to boot. And a bit scary knowing that we do have the ability to make a choice which could royally fuck our employer up the ass, potentially stealing the entire student body.

Sadly however, my principal who has worked her ass off for her teachers has fallen somewhat into our bad books as she perpetuated her employers lies, lying through her teeth herself.

Anyhow, there's still loads of unknowns and boring details that i won't get into. All of which somehow make for a divisive and stressy atmosphere at school, which has made it hard for teachers to muster up enough focus to organize another 90 minutes of instruction.

Idiots!!!

2011-03-05T20:08:00.000-08:00

Sorry this is a tiny bit old, but if you haven't seen the above yet, then, there ya go.

Ok ok you all know that the Chinese govt censors some things. Fine, that's the way it is. China, love it or leave it. But if you DO live in China, then maybe you should at least understand the way it works around here. If you don't like (for example) something like censorship, then is it wise to post a video like the one above on the Chinese internet? That's just giving the Chinese govt all the justification they need to make sure that super strict surveillance of people's surfing habits is required.

The fact that the video is a cute cartoon is proof that it's intended to appeal to young and impressionable minds, opening ripe possibilities of creating revolutionaries.

People in China need to be a little bit more f'ing SENSITIVE to the dangers that less than purely communist ideas could spread.

If you know people in China, please let them know how to behave respectfully in order to create a harmonious society for all Chinese citizens, young and old, for all China, Asia, and the world!

The Porn Addiction

2011-02-26T22:46:00.000-08:00

I too was surprised when i got out of the Mount Emei monastery and into a hotel room to see how much grip pornography had over me. "Ok, I'll just finish this email and blog and then I can browse Redtube." (Redtube is one of countless sites which has evaded the censors so far). But then it was mere seconds before I'd peeked at Redtube, 'cause hey I might as well start the streaming so it's ready when i finish my chores, and... etc etc. Next thing you know 1 hr of porn clips later, i'm realizing my intended 4 hrs of meditation that day is quickly becoming an impossibility.

Then back to Beijing.

Q comes across a porn site on my computer and asks if i was jerking off. "Of course" was my answer. But later she confides that my porn consumption really bugs her, and she feels disrespected by it. I never felt that i was disrespecting her by using porn, though i generally kept it out of sight since i know she's not into it. Nonetheless i can totally understand her feeling that way.

At first i wished that she was a Savage Love devotee, like myself, as Dan always staunchly defends moderate usage of porn by boyfriends and hubbies. See here and here, if you like. But then hey, even i can recognize that porn is one of the less healthy entities in my life. A time killer for sure. In Buddhist terms, it's definitely bad as it's designed to increase craving, craving being the key cause of suffering. Funny, Dan never takes the Buddhist angle.

Anyhow, though i don't think i'll ax porn out of my life quite yet, i'm doing a month without. Which has been going... great! No prob! Although i have debated about where a website like truedirtystories.com fits in. Hmmm.

This porn break also fits in w/ a Meditate Every Day in February stint that a bunch of people are doing.

Well let's see if everything keeps under control in another few weeks.

And hey, that's RON JEREMY in the pic there. Dang, what a surprisingly decent-looking hunk he once was.

Holiday Recap

2011-02-14T19:11:00.000-08:00

2 weeks on the road.
Chengdu, Leshan, Mount Emei, Chongqing.

Chengdu city for Chinese New Year celebrations. Massiveassive crowds in select parks and Buddhist temples. Reminded me of Lollapolooza crowds all crammed in and heaving. Except no hipsters, and throw in all the old people and toddlers.

Saw some dance and singing performances which were reasonably entertaining. One charismatic singer had a good voice, but i didn't care since i assumed he was lip syncing. I was shocked and impressed to later realize that (gasp!) he was actually singing!

Also saw some tigers and a bear perform, which was occasionally impressive though constantly rather depressing. Still: i didn't know a bear could really dance!

Visited one of China's oldest rock and roll bars: a bit of a hole in the wall where deliberate attention was paid to local music as opposed to Taiwan pop. I wish Little Bar was in Beijing. Also visited some very slick and somewhat sexed out clubs; yawn.

Leshan
Then i went to see the world's biggest Buddha near Leshan. And yes, it's very large, hence the "-est". However, FOUR hours of line up to see the damn thing kinda sucked out my enthusiasm. It was like, "well, I've waited an hour already, and I'm almost at the front now," only to get released to the next stage of the line, when you go "well, I've already waited 2 hours already so I don't want to leave now." Note to self: reconsider the idea that maybe an early bailout is preferable to another 2 hours of pushing and squeezing people who obviously should NOT even pause to take photos 'cause it slows down the flow.

Add in reflections about how tourism and religion make awkward bedfellows as i consider all the cameras prying the spiritual energy out of this 71 meter high Buddha.

Mount Emei
Note to self: mountains are bigger than I seem to think, based on some attractive but not to scale "maps". Hence i spent 1.5 days getting to the peak, the only dude lugging up a big ol backpack.

Spent the first night in a gorgeous old Xi Xiangchi monastery, where the monks were friendly, and the sunset was breathtaking. Was going to chill there a while, but this family i hiked w/ some convinced me at the last minute that i HAD to continue up to the peak. So i did, skipping out on the cable car ride near the peak. (The masses take buses up the mountain, hiking 1 km of outrageously slippery and dangerous staircases (often in high heels) up to the cable car). But despite my body's fatigued state, that just seemed like too much of a cop out after the distance i'd already covered.

When my snail's pace did finally get me to the peak, the blue sky above, the ocean of clouds below, the sparkling temples, and golden buddha all conspired to bring tears to my eyes. Really i felt elated to be in that stunningly beautiful environment.

Nonetheless after a foggy no-show of the next sunrise, i still bid a hasty retreat bk down the mountain (yes, employing both the cable car and the bus) to get back down the mountain to Baguo Monastery near the base to get in some meditation.

Simple room, just off the courtyard between temple halls, where I could hear the monks chanting each morning and gongs gonging throughout the day. Short stay, but i did get up to 8 hours of sitting in in a day, definitely aided by the environment and concentrated energy there. i chitchatted w/ some monks who to my surprise, invited me to sit in on the chanting the next morning. Wow, those were some otherworldly sounds to be bathed in for 45 minutes. Occasionally in a temple i see Buddhas who are emanating energy, or seem cognizant of your presence. Well no wonder those Buddha statues get all charged up if monks are praying to them like that each day. Pay attention. Hands together. Kneel. Bow. Stand. Hands down. Hands together. Turn. Kneel. March around the room (hands together). Stand. Bow, etc etc. Beautiful way to finish off my stay there.

Next stop: Leshan, just to catch a bus to Chongqing. Tickets sold out. Spend the night in a somewhat dodgy hotel, and waste too much time looking at porn sites, and only sat 2 of my intended 4 hours.

Chongqing.
Short stay in a big city. Feels really... Chinese. Coolies hauling boxes up and down the steep streets. Alleys brimming with staircases and vendors. Street foods on constant display. Cruise and cargo ships clogging up the brown waters of the Yangtze river. Posh restaurants with filthy washrooms. Cockroaches strolling past the scalding hot pot at the table centre. Another city that I'd like to revisit: check.

Stinky Tofu

2011-02-13T23:31:00.000-08:00

If you haven't heard of stinky tofu, it's a style of fermented tofu which kind of reeks. It's called "chou dofu". The translation of that is literally "stinky tofu". It literally smells like feces. For example one time a few of us came across a pungent smell on the sidewalk and we debated momentarily whether it was stinky tofu or reeking bathroom. Seriously.

About a year ago i was a bit baked, wandering the streets, and decided to try some "chou dofu". Likely enhanced by my altered state, i realized that this tofu wasn't stinky at all, it was... AMAZING! Yup, i chowed that shit down, and wished i had more.

Part 2.

This year, I was in Chengdu, where the food flavours pull no punches, where 50% of the food is spiced in ways that leave you gasping for air, and your tastebuds numb. I was a bit baked so I decided to give the chou dofu another go. Here the style is skewered, fried, and bathed in salt and chili. I could smell the stand a mile away. Unfortunately, i didn't have the same rapturous experience. About 1 minute into my tofu, I realized... it really does taste like shit. Not human shit, but more like horse manure. Of the salty and spicy variety. I wished i'd only bought one instead of 2, considered throwing it away, but decided that would be wasteful and i needed the protein plus ... well, wasn't i trying to embrace the whole chou dofu culture?

Anyhow, I'll wait a bit before i try it again, and frankly i think it is quite a bit milder up north. Do note, however, that this delicacy is truly popular throughout huge swathes of China, east and south Asia... Can millions of stinky tofu eaters be wrong?

pix by
http://supahcute.com/2009/08/19/stinky-tofu/
and
http://planetgreen.discovery.com/food-health/7-unexpected-slightly-gross-protein-sources-think-wasps-and-super-stinky-tofu.html

Heading Out Today

2011-02-01T16:59:00.000-08:00

Not yesterday.

Although I did pack my bags and hop on a subway to the railway station, only to receive a phone call from Q and to have her say, "why are you going to the station TODAY? You said you're leaving on the 2nd!"

Oops. This kind of confusion has been long running with me. My bad.

So I'm off today. First I'll pop into a park to see some Chinese New Year festivities. the firecrackers have already started booming around 8 am. Sheesh.

Then overnight train to Chengdu, where i'll hang out for a few days, most likely bypassing the pandas. Pandas: certainly worthwhile if my gf were w/ me, but you know how it is...

Then off to Mount Emei, which is dotted with buddhist temples and tourists, to meditate for... 5 days. Eventually heading to Chongqing, a central historical city in China.

That's roughly it.
Daily itinerary intentions: meditation, reading, studying Chinese, push ups. I'll see if i can do this til work kicks in again.

Later, folks.

My Digs

2011-01-29T01:39:00.001-08:00

Meant to post these long long ago. But anyhow, this is what $7400 rmb/month ($1140/month) will get you around here. Everybody says "SEVEN THOUSAND FOUR HUNDRED??? That's way too much!" but most things that were say, 5000 rmb for 2 bedrooms, were ske-e-e-echy! This place is a 2 bedroom loft (that's us up on the top 2 floors) which could be adapted to 3 bedrooms. 6th (and 7th) floors. No elevator. Partially furnished. A landlord who's sorta nice, but not particularly helpful. A landlord who rented out OUR parking space when we said we didn't have a car (and i wanted to rent that space out myself...)

Anyhow, it's home, and if i do say so myself, a pretty sweet one. And hells yeah to not taking a buses and subways for 1 hr to get downtown every weekend!

Just Getting Ready...

2011-01-28T01:35:00.000-08:00

Presently it's been a week out of 4 for my Spring Festival holiday. So far just been puttering around Beijing. Spent some time trying, and finally succeeding in scoring a train ticket to Chengdu. Not an easy task, as i am but one of 230 MILLION people trying to book a train home for Spring Festival. Spring Festival is like the family holiday equivalent of Christmas, as there's millions of people for whom it's the only time they see their families.

So that being the case, I wasn't trying too hard to get the tickets, usually only waiting in line for 15 minutes to see if there was a ticket around (and was usually told "no"), and was convinced by Q not to bother trying to book until Spring Fest is already underway. True enough, the next time I inquired, there was indeed a ticket available. "But only the most expensive tickets are available" said the lady. No problem: i feel guilty enough taking that ticket when some poor guy/woman is just itching to score any ticket to avoid the momentarily bloated flight tickets.

So anyhow, Feb 2nd, I'm off to Chengdu. Plan to spend a few days meditating on Emei Mountain, which is covered in buddhist temples. And tourists. Will probably pass up on the opportunity to play with pandas unless Q manages to find enough time to come out after visiting with her family.

Note: Last year i met her folks, but this year wasn't quite invited since Q thinks she and her dad will be... discussing things. ie) her relationship with me. Ehm... hope that goes well. i thought i oughta pay a visit, but Q thinks it's best this way. Ah well.

As for the holiday so far, it certainly is nice to, you know, not work. Although i did start reading Pride and Prejudice recently in prep to teach the gr 12s (wow, that first page is pretty damn funny, i'll have you know). And there's some other prep which i haven't touched yet. Hey: it's holiday time. can't i relax for the 1st week at least?

No News Is ... Bad News

2011-01-22T21:13:00.000-08:00

Well you know how when people are depressed they tend to get more reclusive. When i'm not doing so hot i tend to be less social.

That's not so good.

Anyhow things w/ Q were starting to drag a while back and were incrementally feeling more strained in general.

So one night when we talked about things, things got unexpectedly messy, we almost broke up, and we wound up with an apartment that needed a lot of cleaning, and i missed a day of work. We also were awarded with... another chance.

Early in the morning, we had a super frank conversation, and despite all, we still love each other. Wow, we really almost threw in the towel, but after an intense night, find some renewed hope and positivity.

And hey, did you know that i just started my spring festival 1 month holiday? Good to have more time and an intended excursion to Sichuan w/ Q!

Happy Not So New Year

2011-01-11T04:22:00.000-08:00

Well, that went by in a hurry. Sort of.

Was gonna do some sort of recap on 2010, but that seems like a lot of effort, and i'm a bit of a burn out these days. Ok, ok, i'll keep it short.

-met the gf's parents!
-glossy Japanese cityscapes!
-solitude in snow covered forests!
-mediocre performance on stage!
-and was offered payment!
-moved to dntn BJ!
-moved in w/ my gf and brother!
-got informed that another misstep will get me fired!
-revisited lots of loved ones in Vancouver, BC, Canada!
-got baked!
-got clean!
-got unclean again!
-ate stinky tofu and liked it!
-became buddhist!
-watched the moonrise!
-stayed up till the sun came up
-worked uncountable overtime hours!
-got my gf to toke up and swim naked at Wreck!

Well, that doesn't look so bad. Kinda makes up for all the ups and downs and stresses which i conscientiously omitted from putting on the list.

As for new year's eve itself, it was a bit weird. before dinner we visited L'Occidental, cause i got a couple bottles of stuff for Q for Christmas, but then she saw they were too close to the expiration date, so wanted to exchange them. At the store she realized that they were on sale together and was pissed off 'cause she thought i only got them 'cause they were cheap. Only partly true: they're actually much more expensive in China than in Canada, and so i did figure that getting them on sale was pragmatic, and why wouldn't someone want eye cream w/ Shea Butter?

But in Q's eyes, it was a major loss of face. Like buying someone food that's ready to rot. Not thoughtful, AND cheap. She was pissed off, and stated that she wanted to bail out on the planned trip to Qingdao the next morning. So i had to do some damage control to get things back on track.

Then it was like 11:30, and Derrick was like, "So are we going to go somewhere or what?" So we considered going, but in the end just meditated through midnight, not unlike my good ol' DIY Dharma gang in Vancouver.

Originally planned to go to my friend Yuqi's gig, but then we realized it was on Sat 1st, not Fri 31st. So that was a no-go. When i told a friend (who's in Yuqi's band) that we couldn't attend the party, he said, "Really? I thought you were opening for us!" Um... no...

On the Road Again

2010-12-23T23:44:00.000-08:00

I drove on the streets of Beijing for the first time last night. Which was kinda fun, but a bit stressy. Driving some very new very expensive big black BMW SUV. Q's friend has a rich bf. All sorts of new-fangled doohickey's to confuse drivers of regular cars.

She hurt her tailbone, so wasn't so comfy driving. Ok, i'll do it. Don't worry you can drive really slow, she said. Although in the end, it was a bit sketch since she had me doing all sorts of illegal turns and squeezing through the skechy traffic circles, gunning ahead of traffic at the lights and stuff. I wondered occasionally if it really was stupid to be driving considering my lack of license, but then again when the hell else would i have a chance to drive in China?

Also, frankly the roads seem a lot less insane to me than they used to. In fact, not only do i feel more adjusted to the way they are, but i truly think that drivers are less insane than they were 4 years ago. Wish i had some hard data on that...

Gigs and Shenanigans

2010-12-23T22:11:00.000-08:00

Had my gig a wk or 2 ago, which was a bit flat, frankly. (well my singing's usually a bit flat, so that goes w/out saying), but the audience (which was a reasonably full house, in a reasonably small venue) was weirdly quiet, i thought. That threw me a bit too. So i raced threw my set, making less mistakes than i'd expected, said thx, and was done. Then my friend's full piece band (6 professional musicians), and sounded amazing, but frankly i still found the audience to be on the quiet side. BJ audiences are like that sometimes, ah well.

And then yesterday was the school Christmas concert/party.

I had my gr 10s sing Happy Christmas (War is Over) and my gr 11s sing Do They Know It's Christmas. I struggled w/ the less than hype 11s to pump their fists in the air and yell "Let them know it's Christmas time at all!", w/ ultimately more success than expected once the audience started yelling too.

Also, my top student asked me to accompany his soul-style version of Oh Holy Night. So i learned that song. He sang it really well, and i did minimal back up. He waved his arms around a bit at my suggestion.

Also two girls asked me to accompany them singing this song, so I learned it. It was ok, but they need more cute smiling before breaking the bigtime.

Also this one somewhat nerdy but sweet student asked me to accompany her singing a song by Queen Sea Big Shark, a pretty decent BJ band i'm surprised any students know about. i was amazed to note the Yeah Yeah Yeahs and Sigur Ros on her iPod when she was looking for the track. And i was stoked when she agreed to let me start off the track solo, before coming on stage wearing my pilots helmet as her grand entrance.

Also one other student asked me to play guitar for her, and i said "no." Seriously, how hte hell can a guy do any teaching when he's wasting all his time trying to learn new songs. Gimme a break.

Anyhow, although the very sweet gr 10s sang much worse than normal, it was still pretty fun.

Top Downer

2010-12-07T03:03:00.000-08:00

So the dog Top made an exit a couple nights ago. Rumour was she was going to her owner M's parents', which would give her owners who were largely around. Good.

But apparently M' parents don't like Top. (Huh? Don't like Top???)

So Top is now back at her disproportionately absent owner's apt. Where she gets out once/day, as opposed to 3 times here, occasionally more.

M reported to Q that Top was quite unhappy, sulking, not even interested in going out for her walk. This really disturbs me, but Top always really wanted out for her walk.

So hearing about Top saddens me.

But i also feel selfish, because I don't particularly want the responsibility or time commitment of caring for a very sweet though somewhat needy schnauzer.

i don't know how the hell parents do it. Hats off to parents.

Three Strikes Your ... Still In!

2010-12-06T03:08:00.002-08:00

Well, since being employed by SinoBright School, i have (count 'em) three times talked about things in my classes which were deemed too sensitive, and word reached the Chinese staff, who in turn contacted my principals who in turn contacted me.

Once last year in Social Studies, i mentioned Tiannanmen.

This year I apparently overstepped boundaries by mentioning... either Tibet or Xinjiang or the Da lie Lamma or Liu Shiabo.

And the sex ed stuff.

And i am the first to admit, i have lacked cultural sensitivity.

And thus was not surprised when following two administrative meetings (neither one of which was attended by me), I was asked to sign a piece of paper which says i understand that should this sort of issue recur, it will precipitate my dismissal.

Sigh.

Oh well, i don't expect to tackle those topics anymore, and really i can easily teach the required concepts without delving into sensitive Chinese politics.

Sex, pbly no, but that's another can of worms, and one which i didn't really plan on opening in such a big way AT ALL.

And finally: received this email today from my boss to staff.

FYI

We will be given an in-service by the Chinese Visa department, in the near future- I assume, on the boundaries for sensitive issues/topics.

'Should be another interesting Chinese experience.

Apologies to my coworkers. Hope it doesn't take up too much of yr free time.

Lost track

2010-12-01T05:31:00.000-08:00

Um, i missed a day bk there, due to internet probs. And chose not to blog at least once due to bad mood. But anyhow, let me take this overdue chance to say thx once again to you, my most steadfast and hardcore readership.

I know i f'ing zero'd out over summer and for a while, but somehow a gang of you stuck by me and continue to do so.

Well, Nov is over (already? Holy SHIT) but i do have a couple blogs to blog about that i haven't quite gotten around to yet. I'm less than caught up in many areas of my life, i feel.

Anyhow, i should jet. Derrick is marking some quizzes for me (God bless him), and is waiting for me to watch a movie w/ him or something.

29 - Gettin' Giggy Wid It

2010-11-29T04:03:00.000-08:00

My plan was
to come to Beijing and start a band.

Which i haven't done.

No time.

But.

I do have a gig scheduled in.

My friend Yuqi, one of the few friends i have in this massivorama city, is one of those few actual professional musicians. Paid to write songs, support bands, invited to play at festivals yadda yadda. Aside: but he's not that professional, 'cause when he doesn't like the band, he looks soooooo bored out of his brains.

He's also buddhist, and often recounts amazing stories about how his master cures his ailments by telling him to purchase and set free animals, and about fish jumping and jumping and jumping for joy in gratitude.

Anyhow.

He invited me to open for him at his next gig, which is a wk and a 1/2 away. i should choose my songs. I should practice. I should secure a digital delay pedal.

I'll bang out some old songs. Like 10yrs + old. Sheesh, i sure hope they don't sound too dated.

Anyhow, it's enough to keep me busy for now.

More on this later.

ps. Weird, that Yuqi's wearing a CBC shirt in the picture, not that he knew that at the time of the photoshoot.

26 - smoldering

2010-11-28T05:30:00.000-08:00

Last spring I was smoking more cigarettes than usual, mostly 'cause it was easy whenever Q was having one.

Summer i smoked a lot of greens, mostly 'cause I was i was happy to exploit the fact that it was easy to.

Then i had my 1 month of pure sobriety, and have had substance use at (imo) perfectly reasonable rates of usage ever since.

A pack of smokes lasts more than a month. Greens maybe a couple times a month. Drinking now and again, though definitely not much lately since i've bn sick.

that said, i had # of beverages last night, topped off w/ a hit of Absinthe, (burns in yr ears, that shit!) and felt pretty decent this morning. Largely, i think it was good to head out w/ my coworkers, Q and big bro for a rare night out. Haven't puked for a long time. Oops, no there was that one time, but it was a really tiny puke, so i'd hardly say it counts.

28 - bye bye doggie

2010-11-27T20:17:00.000-08:00

Top is going bk to her owner today or tomorrow. Well she ain't our dog or responsibility, but it seems certain that she'll have less time, exercise, and love over yonder. So that's too bad for her.

Oh well, maybe we can reconsider later on. Also, my bro's future in BJ is uncertain, and 3 parties to take care of Top has been helpful indeed. So we shouldn't make premature decisions.

And it's weird: it really seems like she knows she's going. She's really mopey and down today. that kinda depresses me.

27 - staggered schedules

2010-11-26T07:59:00.000-08:00

Q and i haven't been seeing so much of each other as of late.

1st she was off to Hangzhou for a few days on a work trip, then upon her return to BJ, she was working on the late side, returning bk to house, when i was already asleep. And then it's good to spend some dn time with each other when the work is done, but frankly the different sleep schedules make it all too easy for crankiness to set in on one end or another.

Sigh.

Well, at least there's no alarms tomorrow morning, and amen to that.

25 - Blow Up In My Face

2010-11-25T05:46:00.000-08:00

How the hell is a guy supposed to have fun w/ all the stress that comes from work?

One kid acting up as of late, apparently distressing other students by his disrespectful interactions w/ yours truly. He and principal duke it out, and he refuses to believe that the class isn't all on his side, thus the principal comes into class to ask all students to write on a slip of paper what they feel about his behaviour. (His request, as stated). In retrospect, i'd have preferred to have stated that was inappropriate to ask students to choose sides, and the results of such a survey (anonymous, but not in fact to be made available to said boy's eyes) are practically speaking, ineffectual.

I plan to play a game tomorrow with the intention of having students do some group building, and spread a little love around again. Sheesh.

Add to that, the vocabulary list from the low group's sex ed class made girl X so uncomfortable that she showed one of her Chinese teachers who showed it to my principal, who did find it to be ... unnecessarily hardcore.

Penis, vagina, masturbation, oral sex, HIV, AIDS, condom, semen.

No diagrams, though that obviously would have been the easiest way to get the pt across.

I'm pretty sure girl X was the one who kept seething, "Gross!" when explained oral sex or such. "Oral sex is when someone uses the mouth on the penis or vagina," I boldly proclaimed.

Note to self, and all other interested parties: sex is not a topic covered in Chinese schools, nor is that seen as a fault.

So even I started squirming a bit, thinking about Chinese school administration or parental reactions...

My principal even asked me if i really need to finish my last sex ed session tomorrow. I said, yes, I have to. Because tomorrow is when I will answer the questions which were all put into the Question Box i passed around today.

Sample questions:
"How do gay have sex?" (Great, now i have to add "anus" to the vocab list).
"Can eat semen unhealthy?"
"How old is sex good?"
"I dream sex everytime. Healthy or no?"
"When is vagina good sex?" (i think this means when is a girl's vagina ready for intercourse).
"How to control sex?" (control sex drive? Pbly. But i'll seize the opportunity to tell dudes that women need more time.)
"What is SM?" (pbly a joke, but i'm happy to discuss it).
"What is too much masturbation? Unhealthy?"
"Why is semen smell bad?" Try less meat, more pineapple juice. Or see a doctor.

So generally, the questions seem super sincere, and there's no way these questions should go unanswered. Also, i was thankful to have proof that the vocab is necessary to talk about these things.

So we'll tie that up tomorrow, and let anyone who doesn't wanna stick around opt out and do puzzles/review. I do give myself a hard time for being out of touch w/ the fact that i'm not in North America, a place where sex ed also causes drama in class and staff rooms.

Well that's all good and fun to write about, but seriously, i can't handle this many headaches in one day.

24 - sex ed

2010-11-24T05:13:00.000-08:00

With absolute minimal preparation, i threw a sex education class at my low class. It's Planning, and we'd just done Healthy Relationships, so it wasn't totally out of the blue.

Vocab includes gems such as:
oral sex - using a mouth on a penis or vagina.
masturbation - sex fun by yourself.

and other simplified definitions.

Stop saying "gross", MaryJane,sheesh.

What is "sex"? We'll opt for the broad def.

Talked a bit about not-sexual fun to be had, and readiness.

Will throw some more ideas at them tomorrow.

i feel alright about tackling this stuff, since i hear that sex ed in China is rather lacking. As in, not covered in school. And hey kids, something that is so massive in teenagers' (and adults') minds is important enough that we should be able to like communicate about it. Dig?

23 - Hump Attack

2010-11-23T03:51:00.000-08:00

Might i mention that it's a slight hassle taking care of an unspayed female pooch. 'Cause every dog male, and even female is driven to check out her genitals. I don't know why i find myself surprised to find animals acting like animals, but seriously a lot of these dogs Just. Won't. Give. Up.

They mount her from behind.

They mount her from the front.

You pick her up.

They jump towards her.

One humped my leg.

So you try and run away from the other dogs.

But sometimes they just follow you.

Owners truly nowhere in sight.

One big black punk followed her home.

All the way up 6 flights of stairs.

So like any dog she loves getting out of the apartment, and it's lovely to see her have fun...

But also having the responsibility to protect her from gang rape is potentially a bit stressy.

Other than that, i'm a bit sick. More rest? Yes please.

22 - Nothing Witty Today

2010-11-22T05:50:00.000-08:00

But nonetheless interesting to say that the pooch is unspayed, and all dogs are annoyingly into humping her and licking her snatch. She even left menstrual blood on the couch, or dripped it onto the floor whereupon she would generally lick it up afterwards. Thoughtful, indeed.

Rumour is she'll go bk to her owner before long, which i have mixed feelings about. She really is a sweet dog, and the little bit of attention she gets here is likely much better than what she gets at home.

Also, I'm too tired, esp after working too much OT, and having little to show for it. I wish i could get more planned out, or maybe just have an easier profession.

Happy to have a cup of ginger tea and an early bedtime tonight! Old man, i am.

Oh, but i'll update the post below w/ a pic of Top, the very sweet and somewhat overpriced dog.

21 - dealing with the meds

2010-11-21T05:46:00.000-08:00

i saw an ad someone placed saying she had a meditation group going on Sundays, so i went to check it out today. Today i was the only other person there.

We sat in chairs, and she showed me a music track we could listen to while sitting. Some new age-y forest elucidations track. (No thanks). So i chose the second track, which turned out to be a guided meditation which was surely used at the end of some 3 day holistic entrepreneurial money-making course.

"Imagine you are in a tropical climate, sitting at the bow of a sailboat... and the black night envelops you..."

funny, my body was screaming at me with aversion as i debated ignoring the instructions and just meditating, or trying to learn something from the instructions, or to at least take it in without my massive personal judgments about what's good/bad.

Luckily, it was only 20 min long, and we both had stuff to do right after.

Inhale, exhale. Whew!

20

2010-11-20T06:13:00.000-08:00

No comment.

19 - The Top Dog

2010-11-19T05:05:00.000-08:00

Last night Q comes into the room, throws on the lights, and says, "Look!"
Through bleary eyes i discern what at first appeared to be a teddy bear but was actually a slightly nervous miniature schnauzer (for those who are into breed names, i found the translation).

It's her boss's. Offered to be taken in by Q since the dog had been forgotten in pet hospital/pet sitter's after a 2 wk stay since her owner was "too busy" to care for her.

So that's cool and fine, esp since it's the wkend right now. But truly, as was the problem with the last dog (and even the cat) I/we really don't have much time to care for an animal properly.

As stated earlier, i really should find a way to stream my teaching work. 10 hrs/day is too much to be average at this pt in time.

Also, weirdly enough, i'd feel the pressure to take good care of this dog considering that he's worth 150,000 rmb. Yes, that would be like TWENTY THOUSAND THREE HUNDRED DOLLARS worth of dog. Q's boss previously worked at a dog farm, and this pup has won competitions, for being a model dog.

Not super obedient or trick-ripping or that, but she really is a perfectly proper extra-cute specimen. Perfectly. Who knew dog eye lashes existed in such lenghths!

Aside: i don't know how i feel about owning a dog whose haircut would exponentially cost more than my own... not to mention the pressure/responsibility to care for a dog who worth a couple budget automobiles and an iPhone.

Anyhow, i concur that our apartment is a much much better place for Top than being forgotten in some animal hospital, even if it's not ideal. Well we'll see what happens in days to come.

ps. Will take a photo tomorrow and will post asap.

18 - Refuge

2010-11-18T03:17:00.000-08:00

So yesterday i drop off names for Buddhist monks to pray for my dad and his dad. Money already paid. Q thinks it's a waste of money, but my bro and i are willing to give it a shot.

At my friend's (where his lama master is staying) he reiterates an offer that i can take refuge if i want, as numerous people have already done. And because who knows the next time i might have an opportunity w/ a good lama.

i hem and haw a fair bit. Don't feel ready. Feel like too much of a sinner. Etc, etc.

But then again, i also like the idea of a lama who my friend vouches for. And i think i expect i'd become a buddhist sometime down the road, and why should i hesitate? Why delay something which could make me a better person or bring more solace into my life? Even if i have less fun due to less sinning?

So i said ok.

So i sit down before the 37 year old Tibetan monk and his makeshift altar. He recites some stuff. I close my eyes and feel wave after wave of energy washing through me. Not unpleasant or pleasant. Just energy. Mind wandering a lot, because i'm already late for dinner w/ Derrick, and wondering what Q will think, wondering what i've gotten myself into, wondering how long it'll take. Also somebody's cell phone starts ringing.

He throws a few pinches of rice over me.

i do my best to repeat some Tibetan lines.

More recitation, and that's it.

Gives me a Tibetan name (to add to my already long list): Yishi San Zhu. Something about wisdom and receiving what i want. Which is alright, though i think i need to want less, don't i?

He says some more stuff, gives me some interesting little gifts, glances at his txt messages, gives me an official Taking Refuge card/booklet. He gives me his card, and says i can call him anytime or txt (since obviously i can't speak Tibetan, and he can get a translator).

I feel fine. Not elated or anything. The idea of being connected w/ a ancient lineage of lamas is really good, though pretty much intellectual.

However later Q says she's a bit surprised i did it since she thinks it's not quite the buddhism that i follow. And it's true, there's a feeling of religiosity that goes w/ this one, and even a bit of... magic.

Oh shit, did i sign up w/ the wrong religion?
Well kids, that's what happens when you impulse shop w/out doing yr research.

Now off to practice my Tibetan prayers.

17 - Predictable, Yet Unexpected

2010-11-17T05:38:00.000-08:00

Sort of spur of the moment decision.

Today

i

became

a

Buddhist.